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Sir And. 'Slid, I'll after him again, and beat him.
Sir To. Do, cuff him soundly; but never draw thy sword. Sir And. An I do not,
SCENE III.-The Street before Olivia's House.
Enter SeBASTIAN and Clown, L. Clo. Will you make me believe, that I am not sent for you?
Seb. Go to, go to, thou art a foolish fellow; Let me be clear of thee.
Clo. Well held out, i'faith! No, I do not know you; nor I am not sent to you by my lady, to bid you come speak with her ; nor your name is not Cesario ; nor this is not my nose neither :-nothing that is so, is
Seb. I pr’ythee, vent thy folly somewhere else ; thou know'st not me.
Clo. Vent my folly! He has heard that word of some great man, and now applies it to a fool. I pr'ythee, tell me what I shall vent to my lady; shall I vent to her, that thou art coming ?
Seb. I pr’ythee, foolish Greek, depart from me;
Clo. By my troth, thou hast an open hand :---these wise men, that give fools money, get themselves a good report after fourteen years' purchase.
Enter Sir ANDREW, L. Sir And. Now, sir, have I met you again ? There's
[Striking SEBASTIAN. Seb. [Draws his sword.] Why, there's for thee, and there, and there :---are all the people mad?
[Beating SIR ANDREW Enter SIR TOBY and FABIAN, L. Sir To. Hold, sir, or I'll throw your dagger o'er the house,
Clo. This will I tell my lady straight.---I would not be in some of your coats for two-pence. [Exit, R. D.
Sir To. Coine on, sir ; hold. (Holding SEBASTIAN..
Sir And. Nay, let him alone. I'll go another way to work with him ; I'll have an action of battery
against him, if there be any law in IN ria! though I struck him first, yet it's no matter for that.
Seb. Let go my hand.
Sir To. Come, sir, I will not let you go. Come, my young soldier, put up your iron: you are well fleshed come on. Seb. [Disengages himself.] I will be free from thee.
What would'st thou now?
Sir To. What, what ?---[Draws. ]---Nay, then I must have an ounce or two of this malapert blood from you.
[They fight. Enter Olivia, and two Servants, R. D. Fab. Hold, good Sir Toby, bold:-my lady here !
[Erit, R. D. Oli. Hold, Toby; on thy life, I charge thee, hold. Sir To. Madam?
Oli. Will it be ever thus ? Ungracious wretch, Fit for the mountains and the barbarous caves, Where manners ne'er were preach'd ! out of my sight! Be not offended, dear Cesario :Rudesby, be gone ! Sir To, come along, knight.
[Exit, L. Oli. And you, sir, follow him. Sir And. Oh, oh!-Sir Toby.
[Exit, L. Oli. I pr’ythee, gentle friend, Let thy fair wisdom, not thy passion, sway In this uncivil and unjust extent Against thy peace. Go with me to my house ; And hear thou there, how many fruitless pranks This ruffian hath botch'd up, that thou thereby May'st smile at this : thou shalt not choose but go; Do not deny.
Seb. What relish is in this ? how runs the stream ? Or I am mad, or else this is a dream : Let fancy still my sense in Lethe steep; If it be thus to dream, still let me sleep! Oli. Nay, come, í pr’ythee: 'would thou'dst be
ruled by me! Seb. Madam, I will. Oli. O, say so, and so be!
[Exeunt, R. D
SCENE IV.--A Gallery in Olivia's House. Enter Maria, with a black Gown and Hood, and
Clown, L. Mar. Nay, I pr’ythee, put on this gown, and hood ; make bim believe, thou art Sir Topas the curate; do it, quickly : I'll call Sir Toby the whilst. [Exit,
Clo. Well, I'll put it on, and I will dissemble myself in it ; and I would I were the first that ever dissembled in such a gown.
Enter SIR TOBY and MARIA, L. Sir To. Jove bless thee, master parson.
Clo, Bonos dies, Sir Toby: for as the old hermit of Prague, that never saw pen and ink, very wittily said to a niece of king Gorboduc, “That, that is, is :” so I, being master parson, am master parson : for what is that, but that? and is, but is ?
Sir To. To him, Sir Topas.
Clo. [Opens the door of an inner room.] What, hoa, I say ! Peace in this prison !
Sir To. The knave counterfeits well: a good knave. Mal. [In the inner room.] Who calls there?
Clo. Sir Topas, the curate, who comes to visit Mal. volio, the lunatic.
Mal. Sir Topas, Sir Topas, good Sir Topas, go to
Clo. Out, hyperbolical fiend ! how vexest thou this man? talkest thou nothing but of ladies ?
Sir To. Well said, master parson.
man thus wronged ; good Sir Topas, do not think I am mad; they have bound me, hand and foot, and laid me here in hi teous darkness.
Clo. Sayest thou that house is dark ?
Clo. Madman, thou errest: I say, there is no dark ness, but ignorance ; in which thou art more puzzled, than the Egyptians in their fog.
Mal. I say this house is as dark as ignorance, though ignorance were as dark as hell ; and I say, there was never man thus abused : I am no more mad than you are ; make the trial of it in any constant question,
Clo. What is the opinion of Pythagoras, concerning wild-fowl ?
Mal. That the soul of our grandam might haply inhabit a bird.
Clo. What thinkest thou of his opinion ?
Mal. I think nobly of the soul, and no way approve his opinion.
Clo. Fare thee well : remain thou still in darkness : thou shalt hold the opinion of Pythagoras, ere I will allow of thy wits ; and fear to kill a woodcock, lest thou dispossess the soul of thy grandam. Fare thee well.
Mal. Sir Topas, Sir Topas, ---
MARIA. Mar. Thou might'st have done this without thy hood and gown ; he sees not.
Sir To.' To him in thine own voice, and bring us word how thou find'st him: come by and bye to my chamber.
[Exeunt SIR TOBY and MARIA, L. Clo. [Sings.] 'Hey Robin, jolly Robin,
Tell me how thy lady does.'
Mal. As ever thou wilt deserve well at 'my hand, help me to a candle, and pen, ink, and paper; as I am a gentleman, I'will live to be thankful to thee for't.
Clo. Master Malvolio ! Mal. Ay, good fool. Clo. Alas, sir, how fell you beside your five wits? Mal. Fool, there was never man so notoriously abused : I am as well in my wits, fool, as thou art.
Clo. But as well ? then you are mad, indeed, if you be no better in your wits than a fool.
Mal. Good fool, some ink, paper, and light, and convey what I will set down to my lady; it shall advantage thee more than ever the bearing of letter did.
Clo. I will help you to't. But tell me true, are you Lot mad indeed? or do you but counterfeit?
Mal. Believe me, I am not; I tell thee true.
Clo. I'll ne'er believe a madman, till I see his brains. í will fetch you light, and paper, and ink.
Mal. Fool, I'll requite it the highest degree ; I pr’ythee, be gone.
Clo. (Shuts the door of the inner room, and sings.]
• I am gone, sir,
And anon, sir,
SCENE V.-Olivia's Garden.
Enter SEBASTIAN, R.,
Enter Olivia and a FRIAR, L.
Seb. I'll follow this good man, and go with you,
[Exit FRIAR, L. And heavens so shine, That they may fairly note this act of mine!
END OF ACT IV.