Imatges de pàgina
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5. (S.)

After the first or prelusive squall of a fractious brat, which you had taken in your arms, to please its mother- the horrible pause during which you perceive that it is collecting breath to burst out with a fresh and recruited scream, that is to thrill through your marrow;-yet you know that, strange to say, if you throttle it, the law will throttle you!

6. (S.)

The necessity of sending a verbal message of the utmost consequence, by an ass, who, you plainly perceive, will forget (or rather has al ready forgotten) every word you have been saying.

7. (S.)

Being placed, and held, under the harrow, by a doting mother, who, first, makes you look over and praise separately, an huge port-folio of Miss' or Master's early school drawings; and then sentences you to hear the urchin repeat all Gay's fables.

Tes. Yes-and there is another specimen of this sort of copyn, quite as delightful to witness:

8. (T.)

Hearing the same mamma recite, and extol, by the hour, the premature wit and wisdom of her baby!

"Incipe, parve puer, risu cognoscere.

9. (T.)

Virg,

Your snuff-box shutting ill-or rather, not shutting at all; so that you carry the snuff, and the box, separately, in your pocket.-Also

10. (T.)

The dead silence of the spoiled spring of your watch-case, when you are anxiously listening for its click.

11. (S.)

The moment in which you discover that you have sent a letter unsealed, containing your most profound and delicate secrets, by one who you know will pay himself for postage, by making himself a sharer in your confidence.—Or, what is still worse:

12. (S.)

While at an idle tattling country-town in your neighbourhood-on searching your pockets for such a letter as the above, missing it—then, recollecting in an agony of horror, that you have, probably, just dropped it in your walk through the high-street-then rushing out in a state of desperation, to seek for it-and, finally, at the moment when you are giving it up for lost, and passing by the market-place in your return homeward, espying the fatal epistle in the hands of a Goth, who is reading the last words of it, (including your signature,) with the voice of a Stentor, to a crowded and laughing auditory of both sexes.

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13. (T.)

Going about for days together with a gaping cut in your right hand, (your bad stickingplaster immediately coming off as often as you apply it,) till it is choaked with dust, as well as widened, and inflamed, by rubbing against every thing. Also

14. (T.)

The process of buttoning and tying your

clothes (ditto of washing your hands) when the fingers are in so maimed a condition, that fastening one button in a quarter of an hour is doing great things!

15. (T.)

A wasp, on seeing your door open, taking an opportunity to call in-or, in other words, flying into your mouth as you are gaping.

16. (T.)

Going cheerily to the Bank for your dividends, on leaving London, and after waiting an hour before you can be served, discovering that you have lost your memoranda of all the names and sums upon which you are to receive.

17. (S.)

In going out to sea in a fishing boat with a delightful party, becoming desperately sick the whole time: -the rest of the company quite gay and well.

18. (S.)

Attending at the Stock-exchange on settlingday, amidst the quack of Ducks, the bellowings of Bulls, and the growls of Bears.

Ned Tes. Yes; while, to complete the

concert,

the STOCK-dove breathes

A melancholy murmur through the whole."

19. (S.)

Thom.

At the House of Commons, during an interesting debate striving in vain to overtake the voice of a rapid speaker with your ear.

Tes. Aye, and I could name one in particular, confound him! who never fails to throw you out in this chace; you may hark away, as much as you will, but the fox, is always sure to be before you.-And since we are upon the House of Commons, I'll give you a misery that will make yours shrink into a pastime :

20. (T.)

Reading over the account of

Ways and

Means," when you have neither ways nor means of meeting the new taxes that pounce upon all your favourite articles of consumption ;—or, in

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