Imatges de pàgina
PDF
EPUB

Ant. S. A trusty villain, Sir, that very oft, When I am dull with care and melancholy, Lightens my humour with his merry jests. What, will you walk with me about the town, And then, go to my ina, and dine with me? Mer. I am invited, Sir, to certain merchants, Of whom I hope to make much benefit; I crave your pardon. Soon, at five o'clock, Please you, I'll meet with you upon the mart, + And afterwards consort you till bed-time; My present business calls me from you now. Ant. S. Farewell till then: I will go lose myself,

And wauder up and down, to view the city. Mer. Sir, I commend you to your own content. [Exit MERCHANT. Ant. S. He that commends me to mine own

[blocks in formation]

stomach;

You have no stomach, having broke your fast; But we, that know what 'tis to fast and pray, Are penitent for your default to-day.

Ant. S. Stop in your wind, Sir; tell me this, I pray; [you? Where have you left the money that I gave Dro. E. Oh!-sixpence, that I had o’Wednesday last,

To pay the saddler for my mistress' crupper ;The saddler had it, Sir, I kept it not.

Ant. S. I am not in a sportive humour now:
Tell me, and dally not, where is the money?
We being strangers here, how dar'st thou trust
So great a charge from thine own custody?
Dro. E. I pray you, jest, Sir, as you sit at
dinner :

I from my mistress come to you in post;
If I return, I shall be post indeed;

For she will score your fault upon my pate.
Methinks your maw, like mine, should be your

clock,

[blocks in formation]
[blocks in formation]

dinner.

Ant. S. What, wilt thou float me thas unto my face,

Being forbid; There, take you that, sir knave. Dro. E. What mean you, Sir ? för God's sake, hold your hands;

Nay, an you will not, Sir, I'll take my heels.
[Exit DROVD), E.
Ant. S. Upon my life, by some device of
other,

The villain is o'er-raught of all my money.
They say, this town is full of cozenage;
As nimble jugglers, that deceive the eye,
Dark-working sorcerers, that change the mini,
Soul-killing witches, that deform the body;
Disguised cheaters, prating mountebanks,
And many such like liberties of sin :
If it prove so, I will be gone the sooner.
I'll to the Centaur, to go seek this stave;
I greatly fear, my money is not safe.

ACT II.

SCENE I.—A public Place.

Enter ADRIANA, and LUCIANA.

[ocr errors]

Adr. Neither my husband, nor the slave return'd,

That in such haste I sent to seek his master! Sure Luciana, it is two o'clock.

Luc. Perhaps some merchant hath invited him,

And from the mart he's somewhere gone to dinner,

Good sister, let us dine, and never fret:
A man is master of his liberty:
Time is their master; and, when they see time,
They'll go, or come: If so, be patient, sister.
Adr. Why should their liberty than our's be

more?

Luc. Because their business still lies edi

o'door.

Adr. Look, when I serve him so, he takes # ill.

Luc. Oh know he is the bridle of your will.

Adr. There's none but asses, will be brided

So.

Luc. Why, headstrong liberty is lash'd with

woe.

There's nothing, situate under heaven's eye,
But bath its bound, in earth, in sea, in sky:
The beasts, the fishes, and the winged fowls,
Are their males' subject, and at their controls:
Men, more divine, and masters of all these,
Lords of the wide world, and wild warʼry seat,
Indued with intellectual sense and souls,
of more pre-eminence than fish and fowls,
Are masters to their females, and their lords:
Then let your will attend on their accords.
Adr. This servitude makes you to keep un-
wed.

Luc. Not this, but troubles of the marriage bed.

Adr Bat, were you wedded, you would ben

some sway.

Luc. Ere I learn love, I'll practise to obey. Adr. How if your husband start some other

where ?

[blocks in formation]

Beshrew his hand, I scarce could understand it. Luc. Spake he so doubtfully, thou couldst not feel his meaning?

Dro. E. Nay, he struck so plainly, I could too well feel his blows; and withal so doubtfully, that I could scarce understand them."

Adr. But say, I pr'ythee, is he coming home? It seems, he hath great care to please his wife.

Dro. E. Why, mistress, sure my master is horn-mad.

Adr. Horn-mad, thon villain?

Dro. E. I mean not cuckold-mad; but, sure,

he's stark mad:

When I desir'd him to come home to dinner, He ask'd me for a thousand marks in gold: 'Tis dinner time, quoth 1; My gold, quoth he:

Your meat doth burn, quoth I; My gold,| quoth he:

Will you come home? quoth 1; My gold, quoth he:

Where is the thousand marks I gave thee, villain?

The pig, quoth I, is burn'd, My gold, quoth he:

My mistress, Sir, quoth I; Hang up thy mis

tress:

[blocks in formation]
[blocks in formation]

Adr. His company must do his minions grace,

Whilst I at home starve for a merry look.
Hath homely age the alluring beauty took
From my poor cheek then he hath wasted it:
Are my discourses duli ? barren my wit?
If voluble and sharp discourse be marr'd,
Unkindness blunts it, more than marble hard.
Do their guy vestments his affections bate?
That's not iny fault, he's master of my state:
What ruins are in me, that can be found
By him not rein'd? then is he the ground
Of my defeatures: My decayed fair +
A sunny look of his would soon repair:
But, too unruly deer, he breaks the pale,
And feeds from home; poor I am but his stale.t
Luc. Self-arming jealousy -fie, beat it hence.
Adr. Uufeeling fools can with such wrongs

dispense.

I know his eye doth homage otherwhere;
Or else, what lets it but he would be here?
Sister, you know, he promis'd me a chaiu ;-
Would that alone alone he would detaia,
So he would keep fair quarter with his bed!
I see the jewel, best enamelled,
Will lose his beauty; and though gold 'bides
stif,

That others touch, yet often touching will
Wear gold and so no man, that hath a name,
But falsehood and corruption doth it shame.
Since that my beauty cannot please his eye,
I'll weep what's left away, and weeping die.

Luc. How many fond fools serve mad jea-S

lousy !

SCENE II.-The same.

[Exeunt.

Enter ANTIPHOLUS of Syracuse.
Ant. S. The gold I gave to Dromio is laid up
Safe at the Centaur; and the heedful slave
Is wander'd forth, in care to seek me out.
By computation, and mine host's report,
I could not speak with Dromio, since at first
I send him from the mart: See here he comes.
Enter DROMIO of Syracuse.

How now, Sir? is your merry humour alter'd?
As you love strokes, so jest with me again.
You know no Centaur ? you receiv'd no gold?
Your mistress sent to have me home to dinner?
My house was at the Phoenix? Wast thou mad,
That thus so madly thou didst answer me ?
Dro. S. What answer, Sir, when spake I such
a word?

Ant. S. Even now, even here, not half an hour since.

Dro. S. I did not see you since you sent me

hence.

[blocks in formation]

Your sauciness will jest upon my love,
And make a common of my serious hours.
When the sun shines, let foolish gnats make

sport,

But creep in crannies, when he hides his beams.
If you will jest with me know my aspect, t
And fashion your demeanour to my looks,
Or I will beat this method in your sconce.

Dro. S. Scouce, call you it? so you would leave battering, I had rather have it a head: an you use these blows long, I must get a sconce for my head, and insconce it too; or else I shall seek my wit in my shoulders. But, I pray, Sir, why am I beaten ?

Ant. S. Dost thou not know?

Dro. S. Nothing, Sir; but that I am beaten. Ant. S. Shall I tell you why?

Dro. S. Ay, Sir, and wherefore; for, they say, every why hath a wherefore.

Ant. S. Why, first,-for flouting me; then, wherefore,

and

For urging it the second time to me.
Dro. S. Was there ever any man thus beaten

[blocks in formation]

Dro. S. Lest it make you choleric, and purchase me another dry basting.

Ant. S. Well, Sir, learn to jest in good time; There's a time for all things.

Dro. S. I durst have denied that, before you were so choleric.

Ant. S. By what rule, Sir?

[merged small][merged small][merged small][ocr errors][merged small]

thee.

How comes it now, my husband, oh! how comes it,

That thou art then estranged from thyself?
Thyself I call it, being strange to me,
That undividable, incorporate,

Am better than thy dear self's better part.
Ah! do not tear away thyself from me;
For know, my love, as easy may'st thou fall
A drop of water in the breaking gulph,
And take unmingled thence that drop again,
Without addition or diminishing,

As take from me thyself, and not me too.
How dearly would it touch thee to the quick,
Should'st thou but hear I were licentious !
And that this body, consecrate to thee,
By ruffian lust should be contaminate?
Would'st thou not spit at me, and spurn at me,
And hurl the name of husband in my face,
And tear the stain'd skin off my harlot brow,
And from my false hand cut the wedding ring.
And break it with a deep-divorcing vow ?
I know thou canst; and therefore, ace, thou

do it.

I am possess'd with an adulterate blot;

Dro. S. Marry, Sir, by a rule as plain as the My blood is mingled with the crime of lust: plain bald pate of father Time himself.

Ant. S. Let's hear it.

Dro. S. There's no time for a man to recover his hair, that grows bald by nature.

Ant. S, May he not do it by fine and recovery ?

Dro. S. Yes, to pay a fine for a peruke, and recover the lost hair of another man.

Ant. S. Why is time such a niggard of hair, being, as it is, so plentiful an excrement?

Dro. S. Because it is a blessing that he bestows on beasts: and what he hath scanted men in hair, he hath given them in wit.

Ant. S. Why, but there's many a man hath more hair than wit.

Dro. S. Not a man of those, but he hath the wit to lose his hair.

Ant. S. Why, thou didst conclude hairy men plain dealers without wit.

Dro. S. The plainer dealer, the sooner lost : Yet he loseth it in a kind of jollity.

Ant. S. For what reason?

Dro. S. For two; and sound ones too.
Ant. S. Nay, not sound, I pray you.
Dro. S. Sure ones then.

Ant. S. Nay, not sure, in a thing falsing.
Dro. S. Certain ones then.

Ant. S. Name them.

Dro. S. The one, to save the money that he spends in tiring; the other, that at dinner they should not drop in his porridge.

Ant. S. You would all this time have proved, there is no time for all things.

1. c. Intrude on them when you please.

f Study my countenance.

* A sconce was a fortification.

For, if we two be one, and thou play false,
I do digest the poison of thy flesh,
Being strumpeted by thy contagion.

Keep then fair league and truce with thy true bed;

I live dis-stain'd, thou undishonoured.

Ant. S. Plead you to me, fair dame ? I know you not:

In Ephesus I am but two hours old,

As strange unto your town, as to your talk ; Who, every word by all my wit being scann'd, Want wit in all one word to understand.

Luc. Fie, brother! how the world is chang't

with you:

[blocks in formation]
[ocr errors][merged small][merged small][merged small][ocr errors][ocr errors]

To counterfeit thus grossly with your slave,
Abetting him to thwart me in my mood?
Be it my wrong, you are from me exempt,
But wrong not that wrong with a more con-
tempt.

Come, I will fasten on this sleeve of thine:
Thou art an elm, my husband, I a vine;
Whose weakness, married to my stronger state,
Makes me with thy strength to communicate:
If aught possess thee from me, it is dross,
Usurping ivy, brier, or idle moss;
Who all for want of pruning, with intrusion
Infect thy sap, and live on thy confusion.

Ant. S. To me she speaks; she moves me for her theme:

What, was I married to her in my dream?
Or sleep I now, and think I hear all this?
What error drives our eyes and ears amiss?
Until I know this sure uncertainty,

I'll entertain the offer'd fallacy.

Luc. Dromio, go bid the servants spread for dinner.

Dro. S. Oh! for my beads! I cross me for a sinner.

This is the fairy land ;-O spite of spites — We talk with goblins, owls, and elvish sprites; If we obey them not, this will ensue,

They'll suck our breath, or pinch us black and blue.

Luc. Why prat'st thou to thyself, and answer'st not?

Dromio, thou drone, thou snail, thou slug, thou

sot!

Dro. S. I am transformed, master, am not I? Ant. S. I think thou art, in mind, aud so am I.

Dro. S. Nay, master, both in mind and in my shape.

Ant. S. Thou hast thine own form.
Dro. S. No, I am an ape.

Luc. If thou art chang'd to aught, 'tis to an

ass.

Dro. S. 'Tis true; she rides me, and I long for grass.

Tis so, I am an ass; else it could never be, But I should know her as well as she knows

me.

Adr. Come, come, no longer will I be a fool, To put the finger in the eye and weep, Whilst man and master, laugh my woes to

scorn.

Come, Sir, to dinner; Dromio, keep the gate :-
Husband, I'll dine above with you to-day,

And shrive + you of a thousand idle pranks :
Sirrah, if any ask you for your master,
Say, be dines forth, and let no creature enter.-
Come, sister :-Dromio, play the porter well.
Ant. S. Am I in earth, in heaven, or in bell?
Sleeping or waking? mad, or well-advis'd?
Known unto these, and to myself disguis'd!
I'll say as they say, and perséver so,
And in this mist at all adventures go.

Dro. S. Master, shall I be porter at the gate ? Adr. Ay; and let none enter, lest I break your pate.

Luc. Come, come, Antipholus, we dine too [Exeunt.

late.

ACT III.

SCENE 1.-The same.

Enter ANTIPHOLUS of Ephesus, DROMIO of Ephesus, ANGELO, and BALTHAZAR.

Ant. E. Good signior Angelo, you must ex-
cuse us all;

My wife is shrewish, when I keep not hours:
Say, that I linger'd with you at your shop
To see the making of her carkanet,

And that to-morrow you will bring it home.

• Unfertile. + Absolve. 1 A necklace strung with pearls.

[blocks in formation]

Ant. E. O signior Balthazar, either at flesh or fish,

A table full of welcome makes scarce one dainty dish.

Bal. Good meat, Sir, is common; that every churl affords.

Ant. E. And welcome more common; for that's nothing but words.

Bal. Small cheer, and great welcome, makes a merry feast.

Ant. E. Ay, to a niggardly host, and more sparing guest;

But though my cates be mean, take them in good part;

Better cheer may you have, but not with better heart.

But, soft; my door is lock'd; Go bid them let us in.

Dro. E. Maud, Bridget, Marian, Cicely, Gillian, Jen'!

Dro. S. [Within.] Mome, † malt-horse, capon, coxcomb, idiot, patch!! Either get thee from the door, or sit down at the hatch:

Dost thou conjure for wenches, that thou call'st for such store,

When one is one too many? Go, get thee from the door.

Dro. E. What patch is made our porter? My master stays in the street.

Dro. S. Let him walk from whence he came, lest he catch cold on's feet. Ant. E. Who talks within there? bo, open the door.

Dro. S. Right, Sir, I'll tell you when, and you'll tell me wherefore.

Ant. E. Wherefore? for my dinner; I have

[blocks in formation]

Dro. E. Let my master in, Luce. Luce. Faith no; he comes too late : And so tell your master.

Dro. E. O Lord, I must laugh :Have at you with a proverb.-Shall I set in my staff?

Luce. Have at you with another: that's, When can you tell?

Dro. S. If thy name be call'd Luce, Luce, thou bast answer'd him well.

Ant. E. Do you hear, you minion? you'll let us in, I hope ?

Luce. I thought to have ask'd you.

Dro. S. And you said, no.

Why at this time the doors are made

you.

against

Be rul'd by me; depart in patience,
And let us to the Tiger all to dinner :
And, about evening, come yourself alone,
To know the reason of this strange restraint.
If by strong hand you offer to break in,
Now in the stirring passage of the day,
A vulgar comment will be made on it;
And that supposed by the common rout
Against your yet ungalled estimation,
That may with foul intrusion enter in,
And dwell upon your grave when you are dead:
For slander lives upon succession;

Dro. E. So, come, help; well struck; there For ever hous'd, where it once gets possession.

was blow for blow.

Ant. E. Thou baggage, let me in.
Luce. Can you tell for whose sake?
Dro. E. Master, knock the door hard.
Luce. Let him knock till it ake.

Ant. E. You'll cry for this, minion, if I beat the door down.

Luce. What needs all that, and a pair of stocks in the town?

Adr. [Within.] Who is that at the door, that keeps all this noise?

Dro. S. By my troth, your town is troubled with unruly boys.

Ant. E. Are you there, wife? you might have come before.

Adr. Your wife, Sir knave! go, get you from the door.

Dro. E. If you went in pain, master, this knave would go sore.

Ang. Here is neither cheer, Sir, nor welcome; we would fain have either.

Bal. In debating which was best, we shall part with neither.

Dro. E. They stand at the door, master; bid them welcome hither.

Ant. E. There is something in the wind, that we cannot get in.

Dro. E. You would say so, master, if your garments were thin.

Your cake here is warm within; you stand here in the cold:

It would make a man mad as a buck, to be so bought and sold. +

Ant. E. Go, fetch me something, I'll break ope the gate.

Dro. S. Break any breaking here, and I'll break your knave's pate.

Dro. E. A man may break a word with you, Sir; and words are but wind; Ay, and break it in your face, so he break it not behind.

Dro. S. It seems, thou wantest breaking ; Out upon thee, hind!

Dro. E. Here's too much, out upon theel I pray thee, let me in.

Dro. S. Ay, when fowls have no feathers, and fish have no fin.

Ant. E. Well, I'll break in; Go borrow me a

crow.

Dro. E. A crow without a feather; master, mean you so ?

For a fish without a fin, there's a fowl without a feather:

If a crow help us in, sirrah, we'll pluck a crow together.

Ant. E. Go, get thee gone, fetch me an iron

crow.

Bal. Have patience, Sir; oh! let in not be

so;

Herein you war against your reputation,
And draw within the compass of suspect
The unviolated honour of your wife.

Once this,-Your long experience of her wis

dom,

Her sober virtue, years, and modesty

Plead on her part some cause to you unknown; And doubt not, Sir, but she will well excuse

• Have part.

↑ A proverbial phrase.

Ant E. You have prevail'd; I will depart in
quiet.

And, in despite of mirth, mean to be merry.
I know a wench of excellent discourse,-
Pretty and witty; wild, and yet, too gentle :-
There will we dine: this woman that I mean,
My wife (but, I protest, without desert,)
Hath oftentimes upbraided me withal;
To her will we to dinner.-Get you home,
And fetch the chain; by this, † I know, 'tis
made :

Bring it, I pray you, to the Porcupine;
For there's the house; that chain will I bestow
(Be it for nothing but to spite my wife,)
Upon mine hostess there: good Sir, make
haste :

Since mine own doors refuse to entertain me,
I'll knock elsewhere, to see if they'll disdain

me.

Ang. I'll meet you at that place, some hour hence.

Ant. E. Do so; This jest shall cost me some expense.

SCENE II.—The same. Enter LUCIANA, and ANTIPHOLUS of Syra

cuse.

Luc. And may it be that you have quite forgot

A husband's office? shall, Antipbolus, hate, Even in the spring of love, thy love-springs ; rot?

Shall love, in building, grow so ruinate? If you did wed my sister for her wealth, Then, for her wealth's sake, use her with more kindness :

Or, if you like elsewhere, do it by stealth; Muffle your false love with some show of blindness:

Let not my sister read it in your eye;

Be not thy tongue thy own shame's orator; Look sweet, speak fair, become disloyalty; Apparel vice like virtue's barbinger : Bear a fair presence, though your heart be tainted;

Teach sin the carriage of a holy saint; Be secret-false: What need she be acquainted↑ What simple thief brags of his own attaint↑ 'Tis double wrong, to truant with your bed,

And let her read it in thy looks at board: Shame hath a bastard fame, well managed; Ill deeds are doubled with an evil word. Alas! poor women! make us but believe,

Being compact of credit, § that you love us; Though others have the arm, show us the sleeve ;

We in your motion turn, and you may move

[blocks in formation]
« AnteriorContinua »