Speed. She is not within hearing, Sir. Speed. And yet I was last chidden for being Val. Go to, Sir; tell me, do you know madam Silvia? Speed. She that your worship loves? Val. What should I see theu ? Speed. Your own present folly, and her pass ing deformity: for he, being in love, could not see to garter bis hose; and you, being in love, cannot see to put on your hose. Val. Belike, boy, then you are in love; fer last morning you could not see to wipe my shoes. Speed. True, Sir; I was in love with my bed: I thank you, you swinged me for my love, which makes me the bolder to chide you for yours. Val. In conclusion I stand affected to her. Speed. I would you were set: 10, your affer tion would cease. Val. Last night she enjoined me to make some lines to one she loves. Speed. And have you! Val. I have. Speed. Are they not lamely writ Val. No, boy, but as well I can do them:Peace, here she comes. Enter SILVIA. Val. Why how know you that I am in love? Speed. Marry, by these special marks: First, you have learned, like Sir Proteus, to wreath your arms like a male-content: to relish a lovesong, like a robin-red-breast; to walk alone like one that had the pestilence; to sigh, like a school boy that bad lost his A, B, C; to weep, Speed. O excellent motion! O exceeding like a young wench that oad buried her gran-puppet! now will he interpret to her. dam; to fast, like one that takes diet; to Val. Madam and mistress, a thousand goodwatch, like one that fears robbing; to speak pul-morrows. ing like a beggar at Hallowmas. + You were wont, when you laugh'd, to crow like a cock; when you walked, to walk like one of the lions; when you fasted, it was presently after dinner; when you looked sadly, it was for want of money and now you are metamorphosed with a mistress, that, when I look on you, I can hardly think you my master. Val. Are all these things perceiv'd in me? Speed. They are all perceiv'd without you. Val. Without me? They cannot. Speed. Without you? nay, that's certain, for, without you were so simple, none else would: but you are so without these follies, that these follies are within you, and shine through you like the water in an urinal; that not an eye, that sees you, but is a physician to comment on your malady. Val. But, tell me, dost thou know my lady Silvia ? Speed. She, that you gaze on so, as she sits at supper? Val. Hast thou observ'd that? even she I mean. Speed. Why, Sir, I know her not. Speed. O'give you good even! Here's 1 million of manners. Sil. Sir Valentine and servant, to you t thousand. Speed. He should give her interest; and she gives it him. Val. As you enjoin'd me, I have writ your letter, Unto the secret nameless friend of your's; Sil. I thank you, gentle servant: 'tis very Val. Now trust me, madam, it came bardy Val. No, madam; so it stead you, I will write, much: And yet, Sil. A pretty period! Well, I guess the sequel; And yet I will not name it:-and yet i care not; Val. Dost thou know her by my gazing on And yet take this again;-and yet I thank you; her, and yet know'st her not. Speed. Is she not hard favoured Sir? Val. Not so fair, boy, as well favoured. Speed. That she is not so fair, as (of you) well favoured. Val. I mean, that her beauty is exquisite, but ber favour infinite. Speed. That's because the one is painted, and the other out of all count. Val. How painted? and how out of count? Speed. Marry, Sir, so painted, to make her fair that no man counts of her beauty. Val. How esteem'st thou me? I account of her beauty. Speed. You never saw her since she was deformed. Val. How long hath she been deformed? Val. I have loved her ever since I saw her; and still I see her beautiful. Speed. If you love her, you cannot see her. Speed. Because love is blind. O that you had mine eyes; or your own hand the lights they were wont to have, when you chid at Sir Proteas for going ungartered! • Under a regimen. Meaning henceforth to trouble you no more. O excellent device! was there ever heard a better? That my master, being scribe, to himself should write the letter? Val. How now, Sir ? what are you reasoning with yourself? Speed. Nay, I was rhyming: 'tis you that have the reason. Val. To do what? SCENE III.-The same.-A Street. Enter LAUNCE, leading a dog. Laun. Nay, 'twill be this hour ere I bave done weeping; all the kind of the Launces have this very fault: I have received my proportion, like the prodigious son, and am going with Sir Proteus to the Imperial's court. think, Crab my dog to be the sourest-natured Speed. To be a spokesman from madam dog that lives: my mother weeping, my father Silvia. Val. To whom? wailing, my sister crying, our maid howling, our cat wringing her bands, and all our house Speed. To yourself; why, she wooes you by a in a great perplexity, yet did not this cruelfigure. Val. What figure? Speed. By a letter, I should say. Val. Why, she hath not writ to me? Speed. What need she, when she hath made you write to yourself? Why, do you not perceive the jest? Val. No, believe me. Speed. No believing you indeed, Sir; But did you perceive her earnest? Val. She gave me none, except an angry word. Speed. Why, she hath given you a letter. Val. That's the letter I writ to her friend. Speed. And that letter hath she deliver'd, and there an end. ⚫ Val. I would, it were no worse. Speed. I'll warrant you, 'tis as well: For often you have writ to her; and she, in modesty, Or else for want of idle time, could not again reply, Or fearing else some messenger, that might her mind discover, Herself hath taught her love himself to write unto her lover. All this I speak in print; for in print I found it. Why muse yon, Sir? 'tis dinner time. Val. I have dined. hearted cur shed one tear: he is a stone, a very pebble stoue, and bas no more pity in him than a dog; a Jew would have wept to have seen our parting; why, my grandam having no eyes, look you, wept herself blind at my parting. Nay, I'll show you the manner of it: This shoe is my father;-no, this left shoe is my father :-no, no, this left shoe is my mother ;-nay, that cannot be so neither ;-yes, it is so; it is so; it hath the worser sole; This shoe, with the hole in it, is my mother, and this my father; A vengeance on't! there 'tis: now, Sir, this staff is my sister; for, look you, she is as white as a lily, and as small as a wand: this hat is Nan, our maid; I am the dog :-no, the dog is himself, and I am the dog,-Oh! the dog is me, and I am myself: ay, so, so. Now come I to my father; Father, your blessing; now should not the shoe speak a word for weeping; now should I kiss iny father; well, he weeps on :-Dow come to my mother, (Oh! that she could speak now !) like a wood woman :-well, I kiss her;-why there 'tis; here's my mother's breath up and down now come I to my sister; mark the moan she makes: now the dog all this while sheds not a tear, nor speaks a word; but see how I lay the dust with my tears. Enter PANTHINO. Pan. Launce, away, away, aboard; thy masshipped, and thou art to post after with oars. What's the matter? why weepest thou, man? Away, ass; you will lose the tide, if you tarry any longer. Speed. Ay, but hearken, Sir: though the ca-ter is meleon Love can feed on the air, I am ove that am nourished by ny victuals, and would fain have meat: Oh! be not like your mistress, be [Exeunt. moved, be moved. SCENE II.-Verona.-A Room in JULIA'S House. Enter PROTEUS and JULIA. Pro. Have patience, gentle Julia. socner: Keep this remembrance for thy Julia's sake. Jul. And seal the bargain with a holy kiss. [Exit JULIA. Julia, farewell.-What! gone without a word? Ay, so true love should do: it cannot speak; For truth bath better deeds, than words, to grace it. Laun. It is no matter if the tied were lost; for it is the unkindest tied that ever any man tied. Pan. What's the unkindest tide? Laun. Why, he that's tied here; Crab, my dog. Pan. Tut, man, I mean thou'lt lose the food; and, in losing the flood, lose thy voyage; and, in losing thy voyage, lose thy master; and, in losing thy master, lose thy service; and in losing thy service,-Why dost thou stop my mouth? Laun. For fear thou should'st lose thy tongue. Pan. In thy tail? Laun. Lose the tide, and the voyage, and the master, and the service? The tide -Why, man, if the river were dry, I am able to fill it with my tears; if the wind were down, I could drive the boat with my sighs. Pan. Come, come away, man; I was sent to call thee. Laun. Sir, call me what thou darest. [Exeunt. SCENE IV.-Milan.-An Apartment in the Laun. Well, I will go. DUKE'S Palace. SPEED. Enter VALENTINE, SILVIA, THURIO, and Sil. Servant Val. Mistress? Speed. Master, Sir Thario frowns on you. Val. Ay, boy, it's for love. Speed. Not of you. Val. Of my mistress then. Speed. 'Twere good, you knocked him. Val. Indeed, madam, I seem so. Thu. So do counterfeit. Val. So do you. Thu. What seem I, that I am not ? Thu. What instance of the contrary? Thu. And how quote you my folly? Val. Well, then, I'll double your folly. Sil. What, angry, Sir Thurio? do you change colour? Val. Give him leave, madam: he is a kind of cameleon. Thu. That hath more mind to feed on your blood than live in your air. Val. You have said, Sir. Thu. Ay, Sir, and done too, for this time. Val. I know it well, Sir; you always end ere you begin. Sil. A fiue volley of words, gentlemen, and quickly shot off. Val. 'Tis indeed, madam; we thank the giver. Sil. Who is that, servant? Val. Yourself, sweet lady; for you gave the fire: Sir Thurio borrows his wit from your ladyship's looks, and spends what he borrows, kindly in your coтрацу. Thu. Sir, if you spend word for word with me, I shall make your wit bankrupt. Val. I know it well, Sir: you have an ex chequer of words, and, I think, no other treasure to give your followers; for it appears by their bare liveries, that they live by your bare The honour and regard of such a father. Fal. I knew him as myself; for from our infancy We have convers'd, and spent our hours together: And though giyself have been an idle truant, He is as worthy for an empress' love, Well, Sir; this gentleman is come to me, Duke. Welcome him then according to his worth; Silvia, I speak to you; and you, Sir Thario:- [Exit DUKE Val. This is the gentleman, I told your lady ship, Had come along with me, but that bis mistress Did hold his eyes lock'd in her crystal looks. Sil. Belike, that now she hath enfranchis'd them Welcome, dear Proteus !—Mistress, I beseech you, Confirm his welcome with some special faveur. Sil. His worth is warrant for his welcome hither, If this be he you oft have wish'd to hear from. Val. Mistress, it is: sweet lady, entertain bim. To be my fellow-servant to your ladyship. come: I'll leave you to confer of home affairs; When you have done, we look to hear from yes. Pro. We'll both attend upon your ladyship. [Exeunt SILVIA, THURIO, and SPEED Val. Now, tell me, how do all from whence you came? Pro. Your friends are well, and have them much commended. Val. And bow do your's? Val. How does you lady t and how thrives your love? Pro. My tales of love were wont to weary you; I know, you joy not in a love-discourse. me • Incite. with bitter fasts, with penitential groans, sorrow. ◇ gentle Proteus, love's a mighty lord; Nor, to his service, no such joy on earth! Pro. Enough; I read your fortune in your eye: Was this the idol that you worship so? Val. Even she; and is she not a heavenly Pro. No; but she is an earthly paragon. Pro. I will not flatter her. Val. Oh! flatter me; for love delights in Pro. When I was sick, you gave me bitter And I must minister the like to you. Val. Then speak the truth by her; if not Yet let her be a principality, Sovereign to all the creatures on the earth. Val. Sweet, except not any; Except thou wilt except against my love. Pro. Have I not reason to prefer mine own? too: She shall be dignified with this high honour,- Pro. Why, Valentine, what braggardism is Val. Pardon me, Proteus: all I can, is nothing thing: She is alone. Pro. Then let her alone. Which, like a waxen image 'gainst a fire, SCENE V.-The same.-A Street. [Exit. Laun. Forswear not thyself, sweet youth; for I am not welcome. I reckon this always-that a man is never undone, till he be hanged; nor never welcome to a place, till some certain shot be paid, and the hostess say, welcome. Speed. Come on, you mad-cap, I'll to the alehouse with you presently: where, for one shot of fivepence, thou shalt have five thousand welcomes. But, sirrah, how did thy master part with madain Julia ? Laun. Marry, after they closed in earnest, they parted very fairly in jest. Speed. But shall she marry him? Laun. No. Speed. How then? Shall he marry her? Laun. No, neither. Speed. What, are they broken? Laun. No, they are both as whole as a fish. Speed. Why then, how stands the matter with them? Laun. Marry, thus; when it stands well with him, it stands well with her. Speed. What an ass art thou? I understand thee not. Laun. What a block art thou, that thou canst not? My staff understands me. Speed. What thou say'st ? Laun. Ay, and what I do too: look thee, I'll Val. Not for the world: why man, she is mine but lean, and my staff understands me. own; And I as rich in having such a jewel, Val. Ay, and we are betroth'd; With all the cunning manner of our flight, I mast unto the road, to disembark [Exit VAL. Even as one beat another heat expels, Is by a newer object quite forgotten. Is it mine eye, or Valentinus' praise, Speed. It stands under thee, indeed. one. Speed. But tell me true, will't be a match? Laun. Ask my dog: if he say, ay, it will; if be say, no, it will: if he shake his tail, and say nothing, it will. Speed. The conclusion is then, that it will. Laun. Thou shalt never get such a secret from me, but by a parable. Speed. 'Tis well that I get it so. But, Launce, how say'st thou, that thy master is become a notable lover? Laun. I never knew him otherwise. Laun. A notable lubber, as thou reportest him to be. Speed. Why, thou whoreson ass, thou mistakest SCENE VI.-The same.-An Apartment in | Bat qualify the fire's extreme rage, the Palace. Enter PROTEUS. Pro. To leave my Julia, shall I be forsworn ; To love fair Silvia, shall be forsworn; To wrong my friend, I shall be much forsworn ; And even that power, which gave me first my oath, Provokes me to this threefold perjury. swear : O sweet-suggesting love, if thou hast sinn'd, ter. Fie, fie, unreverend tongue! to call her bad, Whose sovereignty so oft thou hast preferr'd With twenty thousand soul-confirming oaths. I cannot leave to love, and yet I do; Lest it should burn above the bounds of reason, Jul. The more thou dam'st it up, the more burns; The current, that with gentle murmur glides, Thou know'st, being stopp'd, impatiently doth rage; But, when bis fair course is not hindered, bet-A But there I leave to love, where I should love. If I keep them, I needs must lose myself; For love is still more precious than itself: And Silvia, witness heaven, that made her fair! Shows Julia but a swarthy Ethiope. I will forget that Julia is alive, Rememb'ring that my love to her is dead; Love, lend me wings to make my purpose swift, [Exit. SCENE VII.-Verona.-A Room in JULIA'S And, even in kind love, I do conjure thee,- Luc. Alas! the way is wearisome and long. Jul. A true-devoted pilgrim is not weary To measure kingdoms with his feeble steps; Luc. But in what habit will you go along! Jul. Not like a woman; for I would prevent The loose encounters of lascivious men : Gentle Lucetta, fit me with such weeds As may beseen some well-reputed page. Luc. Why then your ladyship must cat your hair. Jut. No, girl; Pl knit it up in silken strings, With twenty odd-conceited true-love knots: To be fautastic may become a youth Of greater time than I shall show to be. Luc. What fashion, madam, shall I make your breeches ? Jul. That fits as well, as-" tell me, good my lord, "What compass will you wear your farthingale ?" Why, even that fashion thou best lik'st, Lacetta. Luc. You must needs have them with a cof piece, madam. Jul. Out, out, Lucetta! that will be ill-ft vour'd. Luc. A round hose, madam, now's not worth a pin, Unless you have a cod-piece to stick pins on. Jul. Lucetta, as thou lov'st me, let me have What thou think'st meet, and is most a.anserly: But tell me, wench, how will the world repait me, For undertaking so unstaid a journey ↑ Jul. Nay, that I will not. Luc. Then never dream on infamy, but go. If Proteus like your journey, when you court, No matter who's displeas'd, when you are gode: 1 fear me, he will scarce be pleas'd withal. Luc. All these are servants to deceitful men. Jul. Base men, that use them to so base effect! But truer stars did govern Proteus' birth: Much less shall she, that hath love's wings to His tears, pure messengers sent from his heart; fly; And when the flight is made to one so dear, Luc. Better forbear, till Proteus make returu. Jul. Oh! know'st thou not, his looks are my soul's food? Pity the dearth that I have pined in, |