Nic. This is more and more extraordinary. Surely, I must have been metamorphosed, unknown to myself; transmogrified into some monster, or-But I have more important things to occupy my mind. [Aldwinkle, Lavinia, etc. appear listening.] The great and conclusive truth, at which I have arrived in my grand work, renders my mind sufficiently disengaged to think of love. There is no doubt that Vampires seek an union with mortal beings expressly to prolong their existence on this earth. I shall instantly, therefore, seek the fair Aldwinkle, and achieve our marriage. After what I have endured, meanwhile, a walk in the soft moonlight will revive me. [Exit Nicodemus.

Enter ALDWINKLE, GEORGIANA, LAVINIA, VAUNTINGTON, and DICKORY, creeping in.

Lav. There, sir; you hear what he said. He is a Vampire, and merely seeks an union with my cousin, to prolong his existence.

Geo. Oh, I'm sure I'll never marry a Vampire, Pa! He'd eat me up.

Dic. Ay, kill you wi' kindness.

Lav. You see, he's gone into the garden, to bring himself to life again, in the moonbeams, from the wounds of the captain.

Vau. Why, I did kill him half a dozen times, certainly. Dic. Dang it! I didn't know the moon were a doctor, afore -they be all mad.

[Aside. Ald. What a persecuted old man I am-What's to be done? -how can we get rid of him?

Lav. Listen to me, sir-Guarantee that the captain shall have my cousin, and settle a small fortune on me, and I undertake to keep Mr. Nicodemus from ever troubling you at night again; I'll make him rest, I'll warrant him.

Ald. Do that, and I'll make your fortune equal to my daughter's.

Lav. I pledge, my life on the result; join me a few minutes hence, in the garden, and let the performance of your proImise follow that of mine. [Exit Lavinia. Ald. An odd wench, i' faith-I shouldn't at all wonder if the jade was to keep her word. Let us walk slowly on, for I long to ascertain the truth. [Exeunt omnes.

SCENE VI.-Garden of Aldwinkle Hall, by moonlight.

NICODEMUS, alone.

Nic. Can it be possible, that the moon, beaming such cool pure lustre, can entrance men's minds to madness?-She bathes me in her filmy light, like dew, refreshing and allaying -melting me into softness, and attuning each sterner chord of the heart to love and harmony-Heigho! [Enter Lavinia. By heavens! responsive to my feelings, comes this angelic girl, to captivate and charm!

Lav. My good sir, if you have no particular wish to be knock'd o'the head for an evil spirit, you will give over these. nightly wanderings; hit upon some decisive method of proving yourself an ipso facto man, and rest quietly in your bed at night. Nic. How admirably she will assist me in my learned labors!

Lav. I fear, I am more likely to disturb his learned labors, than to assist him in them.

[Aside. Nic. An evil spirit-nightly wanderings-knock me o'the head! A light begins to break in upon me. Fair creature, how better can I prove myself a man, than by uniting my life's fate with thine? Thus on my knees.

[Kneels. Enter ALDWINKLE, GEORGIANA, VAUNTINGTON, and

DICKORY.

Ald. He's laid, at last-see, he's on his knees, begging for mercy.

Lav. Rise, sir; I know all you are going to say—and, as I've no very particular objection, there's my hand.

Nic. Upon my word-a very sensible girl-she saves one a world of trouble.

Lav. And now, sir, [To Aldwinkle.] I claim the performance of your promise. To rid your house of the nightly visits of this terrible being, and to make him rest quietly, as other Christians do, I have heroically resolved to sacrifice myself, and marry him.

Ald. What! marry a ghost-a vampire-a spirit?

Nic. I see it all. Here has been a grand mistake; you have confounded me with my cousin.

Ald. Well! it seems we've all been cozened and confounded too-however, I'm heartily glad things have turned out as they have; but you, Dickory, how came you to take it into your head this gentleman was a ghost?

Dic. Why, sir, if he warn't a ghost, he was a spirit: and spirits very often get into my head.

XCIV. THE NERVOUS MAN AND THE MAN OF NERVE.

SCENE 1.-Apartment in Aspen's House in London. Door opening to a bed-room window. Table laid for breakfast.

BETTY sweeping the room, and BIGGS arranging the table. Biggs. Well, Betty, I have made up my mind to look out for another place. This will be my last one, if I keep it an

other week.

Bet. La, John! do you think you will better yourself?— Every master or missus has their humor.

Bigys. That I expects; but it's a hard thing when their humor makes every body melancholy. Did you ever live with a nervous man before?

Bet. No.

Biggs. Then I says this-that all people talk of a toad under a harrow, and fish in a frying pan, is quiet and comfort to it. Do all we can, nothing will please him! He won't believe in such a thing as accident, because he says you and I and every body else is in a conspiracy to worry him.

Bet. But how do we know, John, what he has to worry him abroad?

Biggs. Well, I don't say I know who it is pulls the bell, I only know that we hears the clapper. And then such a trifling matter sets him off! A speck on the cloth will jog his nerves as much as the smashing of a bank: and then, what's worse than all, he's doubly nervous.

Bet. Doubly nervous !

Biggs. Yes; nervous strong, as well as nervous weak. Now I shouldn't mind living with a man who was so delicate,

that whenever he shook himself he wouldn't shake me; but you know, when master begins to tremble, he makes us all imitate him.

No

Aspen. [Without.] Biggs! Biggs! Biggs. Eh! he's up! Run, Betty, for the urn. stop. Hush! don't run. Steal your steps, or he'll say you're robbing his rest. [Betty goes out on tiptoe.] Now let me see if the room's in order. Yes-well. What will be the first thing I shall catch it for this morning? I know-he'll abuse me for waking him so early.

Enter ASPEN, in his morning gown, with his watch in his hand.

Asp. Biggs!

Biggs. Sir!

How dare you

Asp. Look at this watch-half-past ten! suffer me to waste my time in bed till half-past ten, on a Monday morning?

"Biggs. You told me, sir, last night, not to disturb you, because you were not well.

Asp. Nonsense, sir! Did you ever hear of a man getting well by lying in bed on a Monday morning?

Biggs. Indeed, sir, it was not my fault

Asp. Don't talk, sir—a nervous man can't bear talking.
Biggs. But if you'll hear a reason, sir—

Asp. Don't reason, sir-a nervous man can't bear reasoning. [Sits at table.] Where's the urn? [Betty steals in with it, and placing it on the table, throws down a plate-Aspen starts.] What's that?

Bet. An accident, sir

Asp. An accident! One of your accidents—a subtle mode of irritation!

Bet. Lord, sir! I never thought

Asp. Stuff! you think of nothing else. [Exit Betty.] You know my weakness of system, and you are all leagued to lay me in my grave! Here's a breakfast!-eggs? bullets! muffins? brickbats! lumps of sugar large enough to pave a street! More of your designs! Where's the paper?

Biggs. [Handing a newspaper.] Here, sir.
Asp. [Dropping it.] Damp!

Biggs. I held it to the fire half an hour, sir.

Asp. Give it to me. Papers are usually dry enough in November. [Reads.] "Bankrupts-Old Baily-suicide-Hor

rible Atrocity! The house of Mr. Crank, a wealthy manufac turer, near Leeds, was entered on the night of the 17th ult. by a gang of ruffians, who threw the unfortunate gentleman into a paddock which contained a bull, who immediately caught him on his horns, and threw him back into the window!" [Throws down the paper.] Here's news! Talk of the good of newspapers! What is their good? All that they do is to make people nervous. [A double knock.

Biggs. The postman

Asp. Biggs, I thought I told you, sir, to muffle that knocker? Do you know that every rap at that door goes to my heart? Are you aware of the weakness of my system?[Shaking him violently.

Biggs. Yes, sir

Asp. Do you wish me, then, to make your body the door and my hand that knocker?

Biggs. No, sir-but if I muffle the knocker people will think you are ill, and then you will have them coming here all day long.

Asp. Go to the door. Stop, sir! Come back, sir! More of your annoyances !

Biggs. What, sir?

Asp. [Pointing to the ground.] Look at that pin! [Biggs picks up the pin and exits.] Vivian is right decidedly right. If I hope to continue my existence, I must leave London. My antipathy to London increases every day. Such a hot-bed for roguery A lamentable fact-every one that lives in London must be a rogue-he can't help it—it's in the atmosphere! my shattered system is a melancholy evidence. Here I am, surrounded every day by a crowd of people, who come cringing and begging solely to swindle me--nothing else. They know the state of my nerves, and they presume on it. My weakness is their strength. If the fact required further confirmation [Biggs enters with a letter-Aspen opens it]here it is. Here's a rascal! a fellow-a plumber and glazier -lives somewhere in a dirty lane-I hire him to lead my house-very well-he leads my house, and my warehouse, which I did not order him to lead-sends in his bill-I won't pay him-tell him to take back his lead-no, will have my money-won't give it then I sue-here, "Sir, unless my account is settled this morning, I shall take the remedy the law provides." There's a rogue!-[Another knock.] Biggs, I'll see no one; I'm out—I'm dead.