Ephesus. Enter ANTIPHOLUS of Ephesus and DROMIO of Cries out, I was possess'd. Then all together Ant. E. Justice, most gracious duke, O, grant me justice! 190 Even for the service that long since I did thee, I see my son Antipholus and Dromio. Ant. E. Justice, sweet prince, against that woman there! 200 She whom thou gavest to me to be my wife, Ant. E. This day, great duke, she shut the doors upon me, While she with harlots feasted in my house. Duke. A grievous fault! Say, woman, didst thou so? Adr. No, my good lord: myself, he and my sister But she tells to your highness simple truth! Ang. O perjured woman! They are both forsworn: In this the madman justly chargeth them. 220 Ant. E. My liege, I am advised what I say, I did obey, and sent my peasant home Then fairly I bespoke the officer To go in person with me to my house. By the way we met My wife, her sister, and a rabble more 230 Of vile confederates. Along with them villain, A mere anatomy, a mountebank, A threadbare juggler and a fortune-teller, And, gazing in mine eyes, feeling my pulse, 250 For these deep shames and great indignities. Ang. My lord, in truth, thus far I witness with him, That he dined not at home, but was lock'd out. Duke. But had he such a chain of thee or no? Ang. He had, my lord: and when he ran in here, These people saw the chain about his neck. Heard you confess you had the chain of him 260 Nor ever didst thou draw thy sword on me: Duke. Why, what an intricate impeach is this! 270 I think you all have drunk of Circe's cup. If here you housed him, here he would have been; If he were mad, he would not plead so coldly: You say he dined at home; the goldsmith here Denies that saying. Sirrah, what say you? Dro. E. Sir, he dined with her there, at the Porpentine. Cour. He did, and from my finger snatch'd that ring Ant. E. Tis true, my liege; this ring I had of her. Duke. Saw'st thou him enter at the abbey here? Cour. As sure, my liege, as I do see your [Exit one to the Abbess. Ege. Most mighty duke, vouchsafe me speak a word: Haply I see a friend will save my life Ege. Is not your name, sir, call'd Antipholus? And is not that your bondman, Dromio? Dro. E. Within this hour I was his bondman, sir, But he, I thank him, gnaw'd in two my cords: me. 290 Ege. Why look you strange on me? you know me well. Ant. E. I never saw you in my life till now. And careful hours with time's deformed hand 301 No, trust me, sir, nor I. Ege. I am sure thou dost. Dro. E. Ay, sir, but I am sure I do not; and whatsoever a man denies, you are now bound to believe him. Ege. Not know my voice! O time's extre- Hast thou so crack'd and splitted my poor tongue Ant. E. I never saw my father in my life. 320 Thou know'st we parted: but perhaps, my son, Can witness with me that it is not so: Duke. I tell thee, Syracusian, twenty years Re-enter Abbess, with ANTIPHOLUS of Syracuse and DROMIO of Syracuse. Abb. Most mighty duke, behold a man much wrong'd. [All gather to see them. 330 Adr. I see two husbands, or mine eyes deceive me. Duke. One of these men is Genius to the And so of these. Which is the natural man, away. Dro. E. I, sir, am Dromio: pray, let me Egeon art thou not? or else his Abb. Whoever bound him, I will loose his And gain a husband by his liberty. Duke. Why, here begins his morning story right: 360 These two Antipholuses, these two so like, Ant. E. I came from Corinth, my most gra- Dro. E. And I with him. Ant. E. Brought to this town by that most famous warrior, Duke Menaphon, your most renowned uncle. Ant. S. I, gentle mistress. 371 And are not you my husband? you then, I hope I shall have leisure to make good; Ang. That is the chain, sir, which you had Ant. S. I think it be, sir; I deny it not. Ang. I think I did, sir; I deny it not. Ant. S. This purse of ducats I received from And Dromio my man did bring them me. Ant. E. These ducats pawn I for my father Duke. It shall not need; thy father hath his life. 390 Cour. Sir, I must have that diamond from you. Ant. E. There, take it; and much thanks for my good cheer. Abb. Renowned duke, vouchsafe to take the pains 340 To go with us into the abbey here And hear at large discoursed all our fortunes: Thirty-three years have I but gone in travail 400 The duke, my husband and my children both, Ant. E. Dromio, what stuff of mine hast thou embark'd? Dro. S. Your goods that lay at host, sir, in the Centaur. 410 Ant. S. He speaks to me. I am your master, Dromio: Come, go with us; we'll look to that anon: Embrace thy brother there; rejoice with him. [Exeunt Ant. S. and Ant. E. Dro. S. There is a fat friend at your master's house, That kitchen'd me for you to-day at dinner: I see by you I am a sweet-faced youth. 420 Dro. S. We'll draw cuts for the senior: till then lead thou first. Dro. E. Nay, then, thus: We came into the world like brother and brother; And now let's go hand in hand, not one before [Exeunt. another. 1 ACT I. SCENE I. Before LEONATO's house. Enter LEONATO, HERO, and BEATRICE, with a Messenger. Leon. I learn in this letter that Don Peter of Arragon comes this night to Messina. Mess. He is very near by this: he was not three leagues off when I left him. Leon. How many gentlemen have you lost in this action? Mess. But few of any sort, and none of name. Leon. A victory is twice itself when the achiever brings home full numbers. I find here that Don Peter hath bestowed much honour on a young Florentine called Claudio. II Mess. Much deserved on his part and equally remembered by Don Pedro: he hath borne himself beyond the promise of his age, doing, in the figure of a lamb, the feats of a lion: he hath indeed better bettered expectation than you must expect of me to tell you how. Leon. He hath an uncle here in Messina will be very much glad of it. Mess. I have already delivered him letters, and there appears much joy in him; even so much that joy could not show itself modest enough without a badge of bitterness. Leon. Did he break out into tears? Leon. A kind overflow of kindness: there are no faces truer than those that are so washed. How much better is it to weep at joy than to joy at weeping! Beat. I pray you, is Signior Mountanto returned from the wars or no? 31 Mess. I know none of that name, lady: there was none such in the army of any sort. Leon. What is he that you ask for, niece? Hero. My cousin means Signior Benedick of Padua. Mess. O, he's returned; and as pleasant as ever he was. Beat. He set up his bills here in Messina and challenged Cupid at the flight; and my uncle's fool, reading the challenge, subscribed for Cupid, and challenged him at the bird-bolt. I pray you, how many hath he killed and eaten in these wars? But how many hath he killed? for indeed I promised to eat all of his killing. Leon. Faith, niece, you tax Signior Benedick too much; but he'll be meet with you, I doubt it not. Mess. He hath done good service, lady, in these wars. Beat. You had musty victual, and he hath holp to eat it: he is a very valiant trencher-man; he hath an excellent stomach. Mess. And a good soldier too, lady. Beat. And a good soldier to a lady: but what is he to a lord? Mess. A lord to a lord, a man to a man; stuffed with all honourable virtues. Beat. It is so, indeed; he is no less than a stuffed man: but for the stuffing,-well, we are all mortal. 60 Mess. Is't possible? Beat. Very easily possible: he wears his faith but as the fashion of his hat; it ever changes with the next block. Mess. I see, lady, the gentleman is not in your books. Beat. No; an he were, I would burn my study. But, I pray you, who is his companion? Is there no young squarer now that will make a voyage with him to the devil? Mess. He is most in the company of the right noble Claudio. Beat. O Lord, he will hang upon him like a disease: he is sooner caught than the pestilence, and the taker runs presently mad. God help the noble Claudio! if he have caught the Benedick, it will cost him a thousand pound ere a' be cured. Mess. I will hold friends with you, lady. 91 Beat. Do, good friend. Leon. You will never run mad, niece. Enter DON PEDRO, DON JOHN, CLAUDIO, BENEDICK, and BALTHASAR. D. Pedro. Good Signior Leonato, you are come to meet your trouble: the fashion of the world is to avoid cost, and you encounter it. Leon. Never came trouble to my house in the likeness of your grace: for trouble being gone, comfort should remain; but when you depart from me, sorrow abides and happiness takes his leave. D. Pedro. You embrace your charge too willingly. I think this is your daughter. Leon. Her mother hath many times told me so. Bene. Were you in doubt, sir, that you asked her? Leon. Signior Benedick, no; for then were you a child. D. Pedro. You have it full, Benedick: we may guess by this what you are, being a man. Truly, the lady fathers herself. Be happy, lady; for you are like an honourable father. Bene. If Signior Leonato be her father, she would not have his head on her shoulders for all Messina, as like him as she is. you. Beat. I wonder that you will still be talking, Signior Benedick: nobody marks Bene. What, my dear Lady Disdain! are you yet living? 120 Beat. Is it possible disdain should die while she hath such meet food to feed it as Signior Benedick? Courtesy itself must convert to disdain, if you come in her presence. Bene. Then is courtesy a turncoat. But it is certain I am loved of all ladies, only you excepted: and I would I could find in my heart that I had not a hard heart; for, truly, I love none. Beat. A dear happiness to women: they would else have been troubled with a pernicious suitor. I thank God and my cold blood, I am of your humour for that: I had rather hear my dog bark at a crow than a man swear he loves me. Bene. God keep your ladyship still in that mind! so some gentleman or other shall 'scape a predestinate scratched face. Beat. Scratching could not make it worse, an 'twere such a face as yours were. Bene. Well, you are a rare parrot-teacher. Beat. A bird of my tongue is better than a beast of yours. 141 Bene. I would my horse had the speed of your tongue, and so good a continuer. But keep your way, i' God's name; I have done. Beat. You always end with a jade's trick: I know you of old. D. Pedro. That is the sum of all, Leonato. Signior Claudio and Signior Benedick, my dear friend Leonato hath invited you all. I tell him we shall stay here at the least a month; and he heartily prays some occasion may detain us longer. I dare swear he is no hypocrite, but prays from his heart. I-eon. If you swear, my lord, you shall not be Lorsworn. [To Don John] Let me bid you welcome, my lord: being reconciled to the prince your brother, I owe you all duty. D. John. I thank you: I am not of many words, but I thank you. 160 Leon. Please it your grace lead on? D. Pedro. Your hand, Leonato; we will go together. [Exeunt all except Benedick and Claudio. Claud. Benedick, didst thou note the daughter of Signior Leonato? Bene. I noted her not; but I looked on her. Claud. Is she not a modest young lady? Bene. Do you question me, as an honest man should do, for my simple true judgement; or would you have me speak after my custom, as being a professed tyrant to their sex? Claud. No; I pray thee speak in sober judge ment. 170 Claud. Can the world buy such a jewel? Bene. Yea, and a case to put it into. speak you this with a sad brow? or do you play the flouting Jack, to tell us Cupid is a good harefinder and Vulcan a rare carpenter? Come, in what key shall a man take you, to go in the song? Claud. In mine eye she is the sweetest lady that ever I looked on. 190 Bene. I can see yet without spectacles and I see no such matter: there's her cousin, an she were not possessed with a fury, exceeds her as much in beauty as the first of May doth the last of December. But I hope you have no intent to turn husband, have you? Claud. I would scarce trust myself, though I had sworn the contrary, if Hero would be my wife. Bene. Is't come to this? In faith, hath not the world one man but he will wear his cap with suspicion? Shall I never see a bachelor of threescore again? Go to, i' faith; an thou wilt needs thrust thy neck into a yoke, wear the print of it and sigh away Sundays. Look; Don Pedro is returned to seek you. Re-enter DON PEDRO. D. Pedro. What secret hath held you here, that you followed not to Leonato's? Bene. I would your grace would constrain me to tell. D. Pedro. I charge thee on thy allegiance. Bene. You hear, Count Claudio: I can be secret as a dumb man; I would have you think so; but, on my allegiance, mark you this, on my allegiance. He is in love. With who? now that is your grace's part. Mark how short his answer is;-With Hero, Leonato's short daughter. Claud. If this were so, so were it uttered. |