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passion in your heart; I know you are, you hypocritical young dog! but it won't do.
Abs. Nay, sir, upon my word.
Sir Anth. So you will fly out! can't you be cool, like me? what the devil good can passion do ? passion is of no service, you impudent, insolent, overbearing reprobate; there, you sneer again-don't provoke me! but you rely upon the mildness of my temper-you do, you dog! you play upon the meekness of my disposition ! yet take care-the patience of a saint may be overcome at last—but mark! I give you six hours and a half to consider of this ; if you then agree, without any condition, to do every thing on earth that I choose, why, confound you! I may in time forgive you—if not, zounds ! don't enter the same hemisphere with me! don't dare to breathe the same air, or use the same light with me ; but get an atmosphere and a sun of your own! I'll strip you of your commission ; I'll lodge a five-and-threepence in the hands of trustees, and you shall live on the interest. I'll disown you ; I'll disinherit you ; I'll unget you! and, zounds! never will I call you Jack again !-(Exeunt.)
CLXIV.-ODE TO FRANCE.*
By Lord Byron.
Or, shame to thee, land of the Gaul!
Oh, shame to thy children and thee!
How wretched thy portion shall be !
A mockery that never shall die ;
Shall burthen the winds of thy sky;
Oh, where is thy spirit of yore,
The spirit that breathed in thy dead,
* As the ode was long, a few versos were omitted.
When gallantry's star was the beacon before,
And honor the passion that led !
They groan from the place of their rest,
To see the foul stain on thy breast; For where is the glory they left thee in trust ?"Tis scattered in darkness. "Tis trampled in dust!
Go look through the kingdoms of earth,
From Indus all round to the Pole,
Shall brighten the sins of the soul;
The world cannot liken thee there ; · Abhorrence and vice have difigured thy name
Beyond the low reach of compare; Stupendous in guilt, thou shalt lend us, through time, A proverb, a bye-word, for treachery and crime.
While conquest illumined the sword,
While yet in his prowess he stood,
And welcomed the torrent of blood ;
And withered the nations afar,
Till fortune deserted his car ;
The savage, all wild in his glen,
Is nobler and better than thou !
Such perfidy blackens thy brow.
At once from thy arms would I sever ; I'd fly to the uttermost ends of the earth,
And quit thee for ever and ever : And thinking of thee in my long after years, Should but kindle my blushes and waken my tears.
Oh, shame to thee, land of the Gaul !
Oh, shame to thy children and thee!
How wretched thy portion shall be !
A mockery that never shall die:
Shall burden the winds of thy sky ;
CLXV.-WILLIAMS, SPLASH, AND ETYMOLOGY.
From the “Child of Feeling,” by George Watterston. Will. She would not read the letter, you say, Etymology?
Ety. No sir, would not-although I endeavored to ingratiate myself into her good opinion, by first enumerating my accomplishments; which having the desired effect, I then astounded her by the profundity of my erudition. The word erudition is derived from
Will. Out upon your erudition ; what did she say?
Ety. Thank you, sir—thank you, sir,—will teach you logic for that—the word logic, sir, is derived
Will. What, again at your derivations? Curse me, if you are not enough to turn the stomach of a fishmonger! Hark'ee, old Grammar, you must lay aside all your
derivations, if you wish to derive any benefit from me ; for by the tooth of the Grand Mogul
Ety. Mogul, sir, Mogul !-Now I think of it, will teach you history-geography-chronology-anthology, and
Will. Zounds! the fellow's mad! I tell you what, old Grammar, if
you don't let me hear this moment what she said, I'll break every bone in your derivative carcase.
Ety. Thank you, sir-thank you-will teach you metaphysics for that. The word metaphysics, sir, is derived from metaphysique, French, which signifies the art of being learned without knowledge. Do you understand, sir?
Will. I understand what will be the consequence of your persevering in this folly-what did she tell you ?
Ety. Oh, what did she tell me ! let me see. I told, I did tell, I was told-mood and tense, sir-mood and tense. She told me, then, that she would receive no communications from John C. Williams, merchant. Do you comprehend, sir, hey ? the word merchant
Will. Begone! old Grammar.
Will. Begone-begone.-(Shoves him out.)—I'll lower her pride in a twinkling.–(Etymology goes nearly out, but returns again.)
Ety. I forgot to mention, sir, that I will also teach you conchology-etymology-physiology.
Will. Curse the fellow! Begone, I say! but hold-go this moment to Polemic'sendeavor to get into the good graces of Julia, who is, I am told, partial to Montford-poi. son her mind against him—tell her I am smitten with herwish to marry her--that my fortune's immense, and shall be her's. But at all events, be sure you make her reject Montford, and
shall be rewarded for it. Do you hear ? Ety. Yes, sir--yes, sir--will do it as certainly as that you are a noun substantive.
Will. Well, away, then, and be careful that you make no blunders.-(Exit.)
Ety. My name's Etymology, at your service--Etymology, sir-well known in this populous city-teach school--sing psalms--write poetry--understand Latin-speak Greekbow I think of it, will teach you any of those branches at a very moderate price--do you understand, sir ?
Spl. You're excessively condescending, sir; but at this time I have no occasion for a teacher.
Ety. There you are mistaken, sir. I think you have. Do you comprehend, sir?
Spl. Curse the fellow! what does he mean? He surely takes me for an ignoramus. But I'll astound him—(aside.) Sir,--hem--the magnitude of your unsophisticated genius-the vast and unbounded comprehension of your clevated mind, which I can see in your unpolished phiz--and the transcendant elegance of your manners, induce me to take into iny most profound consideration the--hem--I mean, the reasonableness of your request, sir.
Ety. Thank you, sir—will teach you rhetoric for that. The word rhetoric is derived from hæc rhetorica, Latin, which signifies rhetoric, or the art of gabbling incomprehensibly—as you do sir. Do you understand ?
Spl. Upon my soul, the fellow's a knowing one, I see-(aside.) I'm inconceivably indebted to your unsophisticated politeness-am, indeed—and will from this momemt become your scholar. But pray what brought you here?
Ety. Why, sir, as you intend to become my scholar, I will let you into the whole secret.
Spl. This is my man-(aside.) Let us step into another room, where we can have a better opportunity of conferring without interruption.-(Exeunt.)
CLXVI.-THE HORRORS OF WAR.
Extract from the Speech of Mr. Gaston, of North Carolina, upon the
Loan Bill, delivered in the House of Representatives, February 17, 1814.
Mr. Chairman,—THERE is something in the character of a war made upon the people of a country, to force them to abandon a government which they cherish, and to become the subjects or the associates of the invaders, which neces. sarily involves calamities beyond those incident to ordinary wars. Among us some remain who remember the horrors of the invasion of the Revolution, "and others of us have hung with reverence on the lips of narrative old age, as it related the interesting tale.” Such a war is not a contest between those only who seek for renown in military achieve. ments, or the more humble mercenaries whose business 'tis to die." It breaks in upon all the charities of domestic life, and interrupts all the pursuits of industry. The peasant quits his plough, and the mechanic is hurried from his shop, to commence, without apprenticeship, the exercise of the trade of death. The irregularity of the resistance which is opposed to the invader, its occasional obstinacy, and occa