shall not find every thing just as it should be!

Sen. That you may safely believe, Sir,-as, indeed, the length of your remaining list, which seems far to out-number mine, sufficiently shews.-Begin, Mr Testy :—this, as you said to me on the subject of Social Miseries, is "your day."

:

Tes. It is first, then, we'll attack the Dressing-room.

62. (T.)

After putting on your clean shirt, finding that the two bottom buttons of the collar have absconded; or, that in attempting their escape, they have unfolded themselves into two or three inches of straggling unmanageable wire :-no time to change.

63. (T.)

A coat tight and short in the sleeves.

64. (S.)

Shaving after a frosty walk, (when the face is pimpled, skin tender, and hand tremulous,) with cold pump water, hard brush, roapy soap, and a blunt razor.-Likewise, shaving, with a blister behind each of your ears.

Tes. A blunt razor, you may well say; was there ever a smooth one? "Radit iter liquidum" is no motto for any of mine, however. Mrs Tes. A blunt razor, indeed!-see what I have done, and hear my misery:

65. (Mrs T.)

Tearing your arm with a blunt pin in dressing; by which, to say nothing of the pain, you are certain of looking like a sempstress for a week at least.

66. (T.)

As you enter the drawing-room,-discovering, in the act of making a low bow, that the seam of your stocking affects the spiral, instead of the perpendicular.

67. (T.)

Repeatedly hitching, and breaking, the teeth of a fine-toothed comb in the same tender place, the feelings of which you had already exasperated by trying to appease the itching with your nail.

"

Ned Tes.

Jamque eadem digitis, jam pectine pulsat eburno.'

VIRG.

68. (T.)

After having dropped out your sleeve-button, without knowing it, rashly thrusting your hand into the arm of your coat, and so carrying the shirtsleeve in a bunch up to the shoulder-leaving your arm, raw, cold, and bare.

69. (T.)

While you are vainly waiting, day after day, for a fresh supply of tooth-brushes-battering your teeth with the ivory, and pricking your gums with the bristles, of your last old one, completely grubbed out in the middle-its few remaining hairs staring off horizontally on all sides.

Sen. Let me finish your picture with a touch of horror that shall petrify the beholder :

70. (S.)

The moment in which a misgiving comes over you, that a servant has clandestinely assisted you in wearing it out!

71. (T.)

After sweltering for an hour, on a hot day, in an

attempt to drag on a new and tight boot, being unable to get it on, for want of size; or off, for want of a boot jack ;---and so, dangling about the house like Prince Prettyman.

In hastily putting on your shirt, (people waiting for you at dinner) stepping it in two :---no other clean.

Ned Tes.

tunicas."

VIRG. Georg.

73. (T.)

Vilely washed, and as vilely ironed linen, which you would not believe to have been in the tub, but for the reeking evidence of rank soap, or lie, by which your nose is fully satisfied of the fact.

74. (S.)

Mis-buttoning your waistcoat, (undiscovered till you have gone into company,)-so that the bottom button seems sent to Coventry by the rest, and wrings the shoulder by the tug on that side.

75. (S.)

Tying your neckcloth vilely, when you wish to be particularly seducing, (always the case!) and only making the matter worse the longer you fumble at it.

76. (T.)

The points of the knee-buckle curving outwards; and so tearing your stocking, and raking your leg, every time you cross your legs.

77. (T.)

On leaving the house, finding that you have lost