PICTURE OF THE SCHOOLS AND THE UNIVERSITIES. The Third Book of the Dunciad closes with a prophetic vision of the Progress of Dullness over the land, and a glimpse of her sons' ascendant in the seats of Arts and Sciences. Proceed, great days! till learning fly the shore, Till Thames see Eton's sons for ever play, Till Isis elders reel, their pupils sport, And Alma Mater lie dissolved in port! The Fourth Book announces the completion of the prophecies by introducing the advent of the goddess coming in her majesty to destroy order and science, and to substitute the kingdom of the Dull upon earth. How she leads captive the sciences, and silences the muses; and what they be who succeed in their stead. All her children, by a wonderful attraction, are drawn about her; and bear along with them divers others, who promote her empire by connivance, weak resistance, or discouragements of arts; such as halfwits, tasteless admirers, vain pretenders, the flatterers of dunces, or the patrons of them. All these crowd around here; one of them offering to approach her, is driven back by a rival, but she commends and encourages both. The first who speak in form are the geniuses of the schools, who assure her of their care to advance her cause by confining youths to words, and keeping them out of real knowledge. Their address, and her gracious answer; with her charge to them and the universities. The universities appear by their proper deputies, and assure her that the same method is observed in the progress of education. The speech of Aristarchus on this subject. They are driven off by a band of young gentlemen returned from travel with their tutors; one of whom delivers to the goddess, a polite oration, an account of the whole conduct and fruits of their travels; presenting to her at the same time a young nobleman perfectly accomplished. She receives him graciously, and endures him with the happy quality of want of shame. She sees loitering about her a number of indolent persons abandoning all business and duty, and dying with laziness, to whom she recom mends proper employments-to this the amusement of the an tiquary, to that, of the virtuoso, and to others, the study of butterflies, shells, &c., with special caution not to proceed beyond trifes to any useful or extensive view of nature, or the Author of nature. The youths thus instructed are oblivious of all obligations divine. civil, moral or rational. Now crowds on crowds around the goddess press, And holds his breeches close with both his hands. Then thus: Since man from beast by words is known, When reason doubtful, like the Samian letter, Points him two ways (Y), the narrower is the better We never suffer it to stand too wide. To ask, to guess, to know, as they commence, To stick the doctor's chair into the throne, • Parliament House and Westminster Hall. † Dr. South, who declared that a perfect epigram was as difficult performance as an epic poem. Give law to words, or war with words alone, O if my sons may learn one earthly thing, That which my priests, and mine alone, maintain, Nor wert thou, Isis! wanting to the day: Came whip and spur, and dash'd through thin and thick, Thy mighty scholiast, whose unwearied pains While towering o'er your alphabet, like Saul, Stands our digamma, and o'ertops them all. 'Tis true on words is still our whole debate, Dispute of me or te, of aut or at, To sound or sink in cano, O or A, Or give up Cicero to C or K. * In the year 1703 there was a meeting of the beads of the University of Oxford, to censure Mr. Locke's Essny on the Human Understanding, and to forbid the reading of it. † Author of the commentary on Pope's Essay on Man. ↑ Bentley's constant friend in college. . Let Freind effect to speak as Terrence spoke Or chew'd by blind old scholiasts o'er and o'er, Sees hairs and pores, examines bit by bit. The body's harmony, the beaming soul, Are things which Kuster, Burman, Wasse shall see, 'What though we let some better sort of fool Thrid every science, run through every school? Never by tumbler through the hoops was shown Such skill in passing all, and touching none. He may indeed (if sober all this time) Or wed to what he must divorce, a muse: * Dr. Robert Freind, Master of Westminster School. Walker! our hat-nor more he deign'd to say, Then thick as locusts black'ning all the ground, Each with some wondrous gift approach'd the pow'r, But far the foremost, two, with earnest zeal, And aspect ardent to the throne appeal. The first thus open'd: Hear thy suppliant's call, Great queen, and common mother of us all! Fair from its humble bed I rear'd this flow'r, Suckled, and cheer'd, with air, and sun, and show'r. Bright with the gilded button tipt its head. Then thron'd in glass, and nam'd it CAROLINE: Each maid cry's Charming! and each youth, Divine! My sons! (she answer'd), both have done your parts: Live happy both, and long promote our arts. But hear a mother, when she recommends To your fraternal care our sleeping friends. The common soul, of Heaven's most frugal make, Serves but to keep fools pert, and knaves awake: A drowsy watchman, that just gives a knock, And breaks our rest, to tell us what's a-clock. Yet by some object ev'ry brain is stirr'd; The dull may waken to a humming-bird; The most recluse, discreetly open'd, find Congenial matter in the cockle kind; The mind, in metaphysics at a loss, May wander in a wilderness of moss; The head that turns at super-lunar things, Poiz'd with a tail, may steer on Wilkins' wings. O! would the sons of men once think their eyes And reason giv'n them but to study flies! And let the author of the whole escape: Learn but to trifle; or, who most observe, We nobly take the high Priori road, And shove him off as far as e'er we can. |