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there be gall enough in thy ink; though thou write with a goose-pen, no inalter-about it.
Sir And. Where shall I find you ?
[Exit SIR ANDREW, R. Fab. This is a dear manakin to you, Sir Toby.
Sir To. I have been dear to him, lad; some two housand strong, or so.
Fab. We shall have & rare letter from him ; but you'll not deliver it?
Sir To. Never trust me then ; and by all means stir on the youth to an answer. I think, oxen and wainropes cannot hale them together. For Andrew, if he were opened, and you find so much blood in his liver as will clog the foot of a hea, l'll eat the rest of the anatomy.
Fab. And his opposite, the youth, bears in his visage no great presage of cruelty.
Sir To. Look, where the youngest wren of nine
Enter Maria, L. Mar. If you desire the spleen, and will laugh yourselves into stitches, follow me : yon' gull, Malvolio, is turned heathen, a very renegado ; for there is no Christian, that means to be saved by believing rightly, can ever believe such impossible passages of grossness. He's in yellow stockings.
Sir To. And cross-gartered?
Mar. Most villanously, like a pedant that keeps ä school i'the church. I have dogged him, like his murderer : he does obey every point of the letter that I dropped to betray him. He does smile his face into more lines than are in a map : you bave not seen such a thing as 'tis. Sir To. Come, bring us, bring us where he is.
END OF ACT IIL
SCENE I.- A Room in OLIVIA's House.
Enter OLIVIA and MARIA, R.
Mar. He's coming, madam ;
Oli. Why, what's the matter ? does he rave?
Mar. No, madam,
ere best have guard about you, if he come;
[Exit MARIA, R. I'm as mad as he, If sad and merry madness equal be.Enter MALVOLIO, in yellow stockings, and cross
gartered, and MARIA, R. How now, Malvolio ?
Mal. Sweet lady, ho, ho. [Smiles fantastically.
Oli. Smil'st thou ?
Mal. Sad, lady? I could be sad : , this does make some obstruction the blood, this cross-gartering : but what of that, if it please the eye of one, it is with me as the very true sonnet is : Please one, and please all.
Oli. Why, how dost thou, man? what is the matter with thee?
Mal. Not black in my mind, though yellow in my legs.-It did come to his hands, and commands shall bc executed. I think, we do know the sweet Ruman hand. Oli. Wilt thou go to bed, Malvolio ?
Mat. To bed l-Av, sweet-heart; and I'll come to thee.
Oli. Heaven comfort thee! Why dost thou smile so, and kiss thy hand so oft?
Mar. How do you, Malvolio ?
Mal. At your request? Yes ; nightingales answer daws.
Mar. Why appear you with this ridiculous boldness before my lady?
Mal. Be not afraid of greatness :'-'Twas well writ.
Mal. 'Remember who commended thy yellow stockings :
Oli. Thy yellow stockings ?
Mal. •Go to: thou art made, if thou desirest to be 50;-'
Oli. Am I made ?
Enter FABIAN, L. Fab. Madam, the young gentleman of the duke Orsino's is returned ; I could hardly entreat him back : he atiends your ladyship's pleasure.
Oli, I'll come to him. Good Maria, let this fellow be looked to.-Call my uncle Toby. Erit Fabian, R.]-Let some of my people have a special care of him; I would not have him miscarry for the half of my dowry.
[Exeunt OLIVIA, R., and MARIA, L. Mal. Oh, ho ! do you come near me now? no worse man than Sir Toby to look to me? She sends him on purpose, that I may appear stubborn to him ; for she incites me to that in the letter. I have limed her.And when she went away now, Let this fellow bè 100ked to :'-Fellow ! not Malvolio, nor after my degree, but fellow. Why, every thing adheres together. -Well, Jove, not I, is the doer of this, and he is to be thanked.
Sir To. [Without, L.) Which way is he, in the name of sanctity? If all the devils in hell be drawn in little, and Legion himself-possessed him, yet I'll speak to him.
Enter FABIAN, Sir Toby, and MÁRIA, L. Fab. Here he is, here be is :-how is't with you, sir ? how is't with you, man ?
Mal. Go off, I discard you ; let me enjoy my private;
Mar. Lo, how hollow the fiend speaks within bim did not I tell you !--Sir Toby, my lady prays you to have a care of him.
Mal. Ah, ah! does she so ?
Sir To. Go to, go to; we must deal gently with him. How do you, Malvolio ? how is't with you? What, man ! defy the devil : consider he's an enemy to mankind,
Mal. Do you know what you say?!
Mar. La you, an you speak ill of the devil, how he takes it at heart! Pray Heaven, he be not bewitched..
Fab. Carry his water to the wise woman.
Sir To. Pr’ythee, hold thy peace; do you not see you move him ? let me alone with him.
Fab. No way but gentleness ; gently, gently: the fiend is rough, and will not be roughly used.
Sir To. Why, how now, my bawcock ? how dost thou, chuck?
Sir To. Ay, Biddy, come with me.-What, man! 'tis not for gravity to play at cherry-pit with Satan : hang bim, foul collier!
Mar. Get him to say his prayers, Sir Toby.
Mal. Go, hang yourselves all ! you are idle shallow things: I am not of your element; you shall know more hereafter. Begone,
[Exit, L Omnes. Ha ! ha! ha! Sir To Is't possible ?
Fab. If this were played upon a stage now, I coula condemn it as an improbable fiction.
Sir To. His very genius hath taken the infection of the device, man.
Mar. Nay, pursue him now; lest the device take air, and taint.
Fab. Why, we shall make him mad, indeed.
Sir To. Come, we'll have him in a dark room, and bound. Follow him, and let him not from thy sight.(Exit MARIA, L.]—But see, but see. Fab. More matter for a May morning.
Enter SIR ANDREW, with a letter, R. Sir And. Here's the challenge,--read it; I warrant, there's vinegar and pepper in't.
Fab. Is't so saucy?
Sir To. Give me.-[Reads.] · Youth, whatsoever thou art, thou art but a scurvy fellow.'
Fab. Good and valiant.
Sir To. ‘Wonder not, nor admire not in thy mind, why I do call thee so, for I will show thee no reason for't.'
Fab. A good note; that keeps you from the blow of the law.
Sir To. "Thou comest to the lady Olivia, and in my sight she uses thee kindly ; but thou liest in thy throat, that is not the matter I challenge thee for.'
Fab. Very brief, and exceeding good sense-less.
Sir To. “I will way-lay thee going home ; where, if it be thy chance to kill me,'
Fab. Still you keep o' the windy side of the law: good.
Sir To. 'Fare thee well; and Heaven have mercy upon one of our souls ! He may have mercy upon mine; but my hope is better, and so look to thyself. -Thy friend, as thou usest him, and thy sworn enemy :
ANDREW AGUECHEEK.' If this letter move him not, his legs cannot: I'll give't him.
Fab. You may have very fit occasion for't ; he is now in some commerce with my lady, and will by and by depart.
Sir To. Go, Sir Andrew; scout me for him at the corner of the garden, like a bum-bailiff; so soon as ever thou see'st him, draw; and, as thou draw'st, swear horrible : for it comes to pass oft, that a terrible oath, with a swaggering accent sharply twanged off, gives manhood more approbation than ever proof itself would have earned him. Away !