No. 210.] SATURDAY, AUGUST 12, 1710. Sheer-lane, August 10. I DID myself the honour this day to make a visit to a lady of quality, who is one of those that are ever railing at the vices of the age, but mean only one vice, because it is the only vice they are not guilty of. She went so far as to fall foul on a young woman, who has had imputations; but whether they were just or not, no one knows but herself. Howiever that is, she is in her present behaviour modest, humble, pious, and discreet. I thought it became is me to bring this censorious lady to reason, and let m her see, she was a much more vicious woman than the person she spoke of. Madam,' said I, you are very severe to this poor young woman for a trespass which I believe heaven has forgiven her, and for which, you see, she is for ever out of countenance.' 'Nay, Mr. Bickerstaff,' she interrupted, if you at this time of day contradict people of virtue, and stand up for ill women. No, no, madam,' said I, not so fast; she is reclaimed, and I fear you never will be. Nay, nay, madam, do not be in a passion; but let me tell you what you are. You are indeed as good as your neighbours; but that is being very bad. You are a woman at the head of a family, and lead a perfect town-lady's life. You go on your own way, and consult nothing but your glass. What imperfections indeed you see there, you immediately mend as fast as you can. You may do the same by the faults I tell you of; for they are much more in your power to correct. You are to know, then, that you visiting ladies that carry your virtue from house to house with so much prattle in each other's applause, and triumph over other people's faults, I grant you, have but the speculation of vice in your own conversations; but promote the practice of it in all others you have to do with. come weary and impatient of the derision of the gigglers of our sex; who call me old maid, and tell me, I shall lead apes. If you are truly a patron of the distressed, and an adept in astrology, you will advise whether I shall, or ought to be prevailed upon by the impertinence of my own sex, to give way to the importunities of yours. I assure you, I am surrounded with both, though at present a forlorn. I am, &c.' I must defer my answer to this lady out of a point of chronology. She says, she has been twentyseven years a maid; but I fear, according to a common error, she dates her virginity from her birth, which is a very erroneous method; for a woman of twenty is no more to be thought chaste so many years, than a man of that age can be said to have been so long valiant. We must not allow people the favour of a virtue, until they have been under the temptation to the contrary. A woman is not a maid until her birth-day, as we call it, of her fif teenth year. My plaintiff is therefore desired to inform me, whether she is at present in her twentyeighth or forty-third year, and she shall be despatched accordingly. St. James's Coffee-house, August 11. A merchant came hither this morning, and read a letter from a correspondent of his at Milan. It was dated the 7th instant, N. S. The following is an abstract of it :-On the 25th of the last month, five thousand men were on their march in the Lampourdan, under the command of general Wesell, having received orders from his catholic majesty to join him in his camp with all possible expedition. The duke of Anjou soon had intelligence of their motion, and took a resolution to decamp, in order to intercept them within a day's march of our army. The king of Spain was apprehensive the enemy might make such a movement, and commanded general Stanhope with a body of horse, consisting of As for you, madam, your time passes away in fourteen squadrons, to observe their course, and dressing, eating, sleeping, and praying. When you prevent their passage over the rivers Segra and rise in a morning, I grant you an hour spent very Noguera, between Lerida and Baloguer. It hap well; but you come out to dress in so froward a hu- pened to be the first day that officer had appeared mour, that the poor girl who attends you, curses her abroad after a dangerous and violent fever; but he very being in that she is your servant, for the received the king's commands on this occasion with peevish things you say to her; when this poor a joy which surmounted his present weakness, and creature is put into a way, that good or evil are re- on the twenty-seventh of last month came up with garded but as they relieve her from the hours she the enemy on the plains of Balaguer. The duke has and must pass with you. The next you have to of Anjou's rear-guard consisting of twenty-six do with is your coachman and footmen. They con- squadrons, that general sent intelligence of their vey your ladyship to church. While you are pray-posture to the king, and desired his majesty's orders ing there, they are cursing, swearing, and drinking to attack them. During the time which he waited in an ale-house. During the time also which your ladyship sets apart for heaven, you are to know, that your cook is sweating and fretting in preparation for your dinner. Soon after your meal you make visits, and the whole world that belongs to you speaks all the ill of you which you are repeating of others. You see, madam, whatever way you go, all about you are in a very broad one. The moral ity of these people it is your proper business to enquire into; and until you reform them, you had best let your equals alone; otherwise, if I allow you, you are not vicious, you must allow me you are not virtuous.' for his instructions, he made his disposition for the charge, which was to divide themselves into three bodies; one to be commanded by himself in the centre, a body on the right by count Maurice of Nassau, and the third on the left by the earl of Rochford. Upon the receipt of his majesty's direction to attack the enemy, the general himself charged with the utmost vigour and resolution, while the earl of Rochford and count Maurice extended themselves on his right and left, to prevent the advantage the enemy might make of the supe. riority of their numbers. What appears to have misled the enemy's general in this affair was, that it was not supposed practicable that the confederates would attack him till they had received a reinforcement. For this reason, he pursued his march without facing about till we were actually coming on to engagement. General Stanhope's disposition made it impracticable to do it at that time; count Mau arice and the earl of Rochford attacking them in the when he falls into such difficulties, is led by a clue instant in which they were forming themselves. through a labyrinth. As to this world, he does not The charge was made with the greatest gallantry, pretend to skill in the mazes of it; but fixes his and the enemy very soon put into so great disorder, thoughts upon one certainty, that he shall soon be that their whole cavalry were commanded to sup-out of it. "And we may ask very boldly, what can port their rear-guard. Upon the advance of this be a more sure consolation than to have a hope in reinforcement, all the horse of the king of Spain death? When men are arrived at thinking of their were come up to sustain General Stanhope, inso- very dissolution with pleasure, how few things there much, that the battle improved to a general engage-are that can be terrible to them? Certainly, no ment of the cavalry of both armies. After a warm thing can be dreadful to such spirits, but what dispute for some time it ended in the utter defeat of would make death terrible to them, falsehood to all the duke of Anjou's horse. Upon the dispatch wards man, or impiety towards heaven. To sh of these advices, that prince was retiring towards as these, as there are certainly many such, the Lerida. We have no account of any considerable tifications of innocent pleasures are doubled, even loss on our side, except that both those heroic with reflections upon their imperfection. The disyouths, the earl of Rochford and Count Nassau, appointments which naturally attend the great pro fell in this action. They were, you know, both sons mises we make ourselves in expected enjoyments of persons who had a great place in the confidence strike no damp upon such men, but only quicken their of your late king William; and I doubt not but hopes of soon knowing joys which are too pure to their deaths will endear their families, which were admit of allay or satiety. ennobled by him, in your nation. General Stanhope has been reported by the enemy dead of his wounds; but he received only a slight contusion on the shoulder. It is thought, among the politer sort of mankind, an imperfection to want a relish of any of those things which refine our lives. This is the founda tion of the acceptance which eloquence, music, and P.S. We acknowledge you here a mighty brave poetry make in the world; and I know not why people; but you are said to love quarrelling so well, devotion, considered merely as an exaltation of our that you cannot be quiet at home. The favourers of happiness, should not at least be so far regarded as the house of Bourbon among us affirm, that this to be considered. It is possible the very inquiry Stanhope, who could, as it were, get out of his sick-would lead men into such thoughts and gratifica bed to fight against their king of Spain, must be of the anti-monarchical party. No. 211.] TUESDAY, AUGUST 15, 1710. Sunday, August 13. tions as they did not expect to meet with in this place. Many a good acquaintance has been lost from a general prepossession in his disfavour, and a severe aspect has often hid under it a very agreeable companion. There are no distinguishing qualities among men to which there are not false pretenders; but though none is more pretended to than that of devotion, there are perhaps fewer successful impostors in this kind than any other. There is something so na If there were no other consequences of it, but tively great and good in a person that is truly debarely that on this day human creatures assemble vout, that an awkward man may as well pretend to themselves before their Creator, without regard to be genteel, as a hypocrite to be pious. The cottheir usual employments, their minds at leisure from straint in words and actions are equally visible in the cares of this life, and their bodies adorned with both cases; and any thing set up in their room the best attire they can bestow on them; I say, does but remove the endeavourers farther off from were this mere outward celebration of a sabbath all their pretensions. But, however the sense of true that is expected from men, even that were a lauda-piety is abated, there is no other motive of action ble distinction, and a purpose worthy the human that can carry us through all the vicissitudes of life nature. But when there is added to it the sublime with alacrity and resolution. But piety, like philopleasure of devotion, our being is exalted above it-sophy, when it is superficial, does but make men self; and he who spends a day in the contemplation appear the worse for it; and a principle that is but of the next life, will not easily fall into the corrup-half received does but distract, instead of guiding tions of this in the other six. They, who never ad- our behaviour. When I reflect upon the unequal mit thoughts of this kind into their imaginations, conduct of Lotius, I see many things that run d lose higher and sweeter satisfactions than can be rectly counter to his interest; therefore I cannot raised by any other entertainment. The most illite- attribute his labours for the public good to ambe rate man who is touched with devotion, and uses tion. When I consider his diregard to his fortune frequent exercises of it, contracts a certain great-I cannot esteem him covetous. How then can I ness of mind, mingled with a noble simplicity, that raises him above those of the same condition; and there is an indelible mark of goodness in those who sincerely possess it. It is hardly possible it should be otherwise; for the fervours of a pious mind will naturally contract such an earnestness and attention towards a better being, as will make the ordinary passages of life go off with a becoming indifference. By this a man in the lowest condition will not appear mean, or, in the most splendid fortune, inso reconcile his neglect for himself, and his zeal for others? I have long suspected him to be a little pious: but no man ever hid his vice with greater caution than he does his virtue. It was the praise of a great Roman, that he had rather be, than appear good.' But such is the weakness of Lotus, that I dare say, he had rather be esteemed irreligious than devout. By I know not what impatience of raillery, he is wonderfully fearful of being thought too great a believer. A hundred little devices are made use of to hide a time of private As to all the intricacies and vicissitudes under devotion; and he will allow you any suspicion of which men are ordinarily entangled with the utmost his being ill employed, so you do not tax him wh sorrow and passion, one who is devoted to heaven, being well. But alas! how mean is such a beha lent. viour? To boast of virtue, is a most ridiculous fine, is the same vice in that case, as to be florid, is way of disappointing the merit of it, but not so in writing or speaking. I have studied and writ on pitiful as that of being ashamed of it. How un- this important subject, until I almost despair of happy is the wretch, who makes the most absolute making a reformation in the females of this island; and independent motive of action the cause of per- where we have more beauty than in any spot in the plexity and inconstancy. How different a figure universe, if we did not disguise it by false garniture, does Calicolo make with all who know him! His and detract from it by impertinent improvements. great and superior mind, frequently exalted by I have by me a treatise concerning pinners, which, the raptures of heavenly meditation, is to all his I have some hopes, will contribute to the amendfriends of the same use, as if an angel were to ap-ment of the present head-dresses, to which I have solid pear at the decision of their disputes. They very well understand, he is as much disinterested and unbiassed as such a being. He considers all applications made to him, as those addresses will affect his own application to heaven. All his determinations are delivered with a beautiful humility; and he pronounces his decisions with the air of one who is more frequently a supplicant than a judge. Thus humble, and thus great, is the man who is moved by piety, and exalted by devotion. But behold this recommended by the masterly hand of a great divine I have heretofore made bold with. It is such a pleasure as can never cloy or overwork the mind; a delight that grows and improves under thought and reflection; and while it exercises, does also endear itself to the mind. All pleasures that affect the body must needs weary, because they transport; and all transportation is a violence; and no violence can be lasting; but determines upon the falling of the spirits, which are not able to keep up that height of. motion that the pleasure of the senses raises them to. And therefore how inevitably does an immoderate laughter end in a sigh, which is only nature's recovering itself after a force done to it: but the religious pleasure of a well disposed mind moves gently, and therefore constantly. It does not affect by rapture and ecstacy, but is like the pleasure of health, greater and stronger than those that call up the senses with grosser and more affecting impressions. No man's body is as strong as his appetites; but heaven has corrected the boundlessness of his voluptuous desires by stinting his strength, and contracting his capacities. The pleasure of the religious man is an easy and a portable pleasure, such a one as he carries about in his bosom, without alarming either the eye or the envy of the world. A man putting all his pleasures into this one, is like a traveller putting all his goods into one jewel; the value is the same, and the convenience greater.' No. 212.] THURSDAY, AUGUST 17, 1710. MR. BICKERSTAFF, and unanswerable objections. But most of the errors in that, and other particulars of adorning the head, are crept into the world from the ignorance of modern tirewomen; for it is come to that pass, that an awkward creature in the first year of her apprenticeship, that can hardly stick a pin, shall take upon her to dress a woman of the first quality. However, it is certain, that there requires in a good tirewoman a perfect skill in optics; for all the force of ornament is to contribute to the intention of the eyes. Thus she, who has a mind to look killing, must arm her face accordingly, and not leave her eyes and cheeks undressed. There is Araminta, who is so sensible of this, that she never will see even her own husband, without a hood on. Can any one living bear to see Miss Gruel, lean as she is, with her hair tied back after the modern way? But such is the folly of our ladies, that because one who is a beauty, out of ostentation of her being such, takes care to wear something that she knows cannot be of any consequence to her complexion; I say, our women run on so heedlessly in the fashion, that though it is the interest of some to hide as much of their faces as possible, yet because a leading toast appeared with a backward head-dress, the rest shall follow the mode, without observing that the author of the fashion assumed it because it could become no one but herself. Flavia is ever well dressed, and always the genteelest woman you meet: but the inake of her mind very much contributes to the ornament of her body. She has the greatest simplicity of manners of any of her sex. This makes everything look native about her, and her clothes are so exactly fitted, that they appear, as it were, part of her person Every one that sees her knows her to be of quality, but her distinction is owing to her manner, and not to her habit. Her beauty is full of attraction, but not of allurement. There is such a composure in her looks, and propriety in her dress, that you I would think it impossible she could change the garb, you one day see her in, for any thing so becoming, until you next day see her in another. There is no other mystery in this, but that however she is apparelled, she is herself the same; for there is so immediate a relation between our thoughts and gestures, that a woman must think well to look well But this weighty subject I must put off for some other matters, in which my correspondents are urgent for answers; which I shall do where I can, and appeal to the judgment of others where I cannot. August 15, 1710. Reading over a volume of yours, I find the words simplex munditiis mentioned as a description of a very well-dressed woman. I beg of you, for the sake of the sex, to explain these terms. I cannot comprehend what my brother means when he tells me, they signify my own name, which is, MR. BICKERSTAFF, Sir, your humble servant, "Taking the air the other day on horse-back in 'PLAIN ENGLISH.' the green lane that leads to Southgate, I discovered I think the lady's brother has given us a very coming towards me a person well mounted in a geod idea of that elegant expression; it being the mask; and I accordingly expected, as any one greatest beauty of speech to be close and intelligible. would, to have been robbed. But when we came To this end, nothing is to be more carefully con-up with each other, the spark, to my greater sursulted than plainness. In a lady's attire this is the prise, very peaceably gave me the way; which single excellence; for to be, what some people call, made me take courage enough to ask him, if he masqueraded, or how? He made me no answer, are not got into the schemes and arts of life which but still continued incognito. This was certainly the children of the world walk by. One would an ass, in a lion's skin; a harmless bull-beggar, think that, of course, when a man of any conse who delights to fright innocent people, and set them quence for his figure, his mien, or his gravity, a galloping. I bethought myself of putting as good passes by a youth, he should certainly have the first a jest upon him, and had turned my horse, with a advances of salutation; but he is, you may observe, design to pursue him to London, and get him ap-treated in a quite different manner; it being the prehended, on suspicion of being a highwayman: but when I reflected, that it was the proper office of the magistrate to punish only knaves, and that we had a Censor of Great Britain for people of another denomination, I immediately determined to prosecute him in your court only. This unjustifiable frolic I take to be neither wit nor humour, therefore hope you will do me, and as many others as were that day frighted, justice. 'I am, sir, Your distinction concerning the time of commencing virgins is allowed to be just. I write you my thanks for it, in the twenty-eighth year of my life, and twelfth of my virginity. But I am to ask you another question: may a woman be said to live any more years a maid, than she continues to be 'I am, &c.' 'August 15, 1710. courted? 'SIR, I observe that the Postman of Saturday last, giving an account of the action in Spain, has this elegant turn of expression; general Stanhope, wh. in the whole action expressed as much bravery as conduct, received a contusion in his right shoulder. I should be glad to know, whether this cautious politician means to commend or to rally him, by saying, He expressed as much bravery as conduct? If you can explain this dubious phrase, it will inform the public, and oblige, sir, Your humble servant, &c.' No. 213.] SATURDAY, AUGUST 19, 1710. very characteristic of an English temper to defy. As I am an Englishman, I find it a very hard mat ter to bring myself to pull off the hat first; but it is the only way to be upon any good terms with those we meet with. Therefore the first advance is of high moment. Men judge of others by themselves; and he that will command with us must condescend, It moves one's spleen very agreeably, to see fellows pretend to be dissemblers without this lesson. They are so reservedly complaisant, until they have learned to resign their natural passions, that all the steps they make towards gaining those whom they would be well with, are but so many marks of what they really are, and not of what they would appear. The rough Britons, when they pretend to be art ful towards one another, are ridiculous enough; dissemble their good with an affectation of ill, they but when they set up for vices they have not, and are insupportable. I know two men in this town who make as good figures as any in it, that manage their credit so well as to be thought atheists, and yet say their prayers morning and evening. Tom Springly, the other day, pretended to go to an assignment with a married woman at Rosamonds'-pond, and was seen soon after reading the responses with great gravity at six o'clock prayers. Sheer lane, August 17. Though the following epistle bears a just accusation of myself, yet in regard it is a more advantageous piece of justice to another, I insert it at large. 'MR. BICKERSTAFF, 'Garraway's Coffee-house, August 10, 'I have lately read your paper wherein you represent a conversation between a young lady, your three nephews, and yourself; and am not a little offended at the figure you give your young mer chant in the presence of a beauty. The topic of love is a subject on which a man is more beholden to nature for his eloquence, than to the instruction of the schools, or my lady's woman. From the two latter your scholar and page must have reaped all their advantage above him.-I know by this time you have pronounced me a trader. I acknowledge it; but cannot bear the exclusion from any pretence of speaking agreeably to a fine woman, er from any degree of generosity that way. You have among us citizens many well-wishers; but it is for the justice of your representations, which we, perhaps, are better judges of than you (by the account you give of your nephew) seem to allow. THERE has of late crept in among the downright English a mighty spirit of dissimulation. But, before we discourse of this vice, it will be necessary to observe, that the learned make a difference between simulation and dissimulation. Simulation is a pretence of what is not, and dissimulation is a concealment of what is. The latter is our present affair. When you look round you in public places in this island, you see the generality of mankind carry in their countenance an air of challenge or defiance'; and there is no such man to be found among us, who naturally strives to do greater honours and civilities than he receives. This innate sullenness To give you an opportunity of making us some or stubborntress of complexion is hardly to be con- reparation, I desire you would tell, your own way, quered by any of our islanders. For which reason, the following instance of heroic love in the city, however they may pretend to chouse one another, You are to remember, that somewhere in your they make but very awkward rogues; and their dis-writings, for enlarging the territories of virtue and like to each other is seldom so well dissembled, but it is suspected. When once it is so, it had as good be professed. A man who dissembles well must have none of what we call stomach, otherwise he will be cold in his professions of good-will where he hates; an imperfection of the last ill consequence Tom Trueman, a young gentleman of eighteen in business. This fierceness in our natures is ap-years of age, fell passionately in love with the beau parent from the conduct of our young fellows, who teous Almira, daughter to his master. Her regard honour, you have multiplied the opportunities of attaining to heroic virtue; and have hinted, that in whatever state of life a man is, if he does things above what is ordinarily performed by men of his rank, he is in those instances a hero. for him was no less tender. Trueman was better acquainted with his master's affairs than his daughter; and secretly lamented that each day brought him, by many miscarriages, nearer bankruptcy than the former. This unhappy posture of their affairs the youth suspected, was owing to the ill management of a factor in whom his master had an entire confidence. Trueman took a proper occasion, when his master was ruminating on his decaying fortune, to address him for leave to spend the remainder of his time with his foreign correspondent. During three years' stay in that employment, he became acquainted with all that concerned his master, and by his great address in the management of that knowledge, saved him ten thousand pounds. Soon after this accident, Trueman's uncle left him a considerable estate. Upon receiving that advice, he returned to England, and demanded Almira of her father. The father, overjoyed at the match, offered him the ten thousand pounds he had saved him, with the further proposal of resigning to him all his business. Trueman refused both; and retired into the country with his bride, contented with his own fortune, thongh perfectly skilled in all the methods of improving it. 'It is to be noted, that Trueman refused twenty housand pounds with another young lady; so that eckoning both his self-denials, he is to have in your court the merit of having given thirty thousand 1 pounds for the woman he loved. This gentleman I claim your justice to; and hope you will be convinced that some of us have larger views than only Cash Debtor, per contra Creditor. Yours, of a full career, to the great surprise and derision of their beholders. When a man foresees a decaying ministry, be has leisure to grow a malcontent, reflect upon the present conduct, and, by gradual murmurs, fall off from his friends into a new party, by just steps and measures. For want of such notices, I have formerly known a very well-bred person refuse to return a bow of a man whom he thought in disgrace, that was next day made secretary of state; and another, who, after a long neglect of a minister, came to his levee, and made professions of zeal for his service the very day before he was turned out. This produces also unavoidable confusions and mistakes in the descriptions of great men's parts and merits. That ancient Lyric M. D'Urfey, some years ago writ a dedication to a certain lord, in which he celebrated him for the greatest poet and critic of that age, upon a misinformation in Dyer's Letter, that his noble patron was made lord chamberlain. In short, innumerable votes, speeches, and sermons, have been thrown away, and turned to no account, merely for want of due and timely intelligence. Nay, it has been known, that a panegyric has been half printed off, when the poet, upon the removal of the minister, has been forced to alter it into a satire. For the conduct therefore of such useful persons, as are ready to do their country service upon all occasions, I have an engine in my study, which is a sort of political barometer, or, to speak more intelligibly, a state weather-glass, that by the rising and falling of a certain magical liquor, presages all changes and revolutions in government, as the common glass does those of the weather. This weatherglass is said to have been invented by Cardan, and given by him as a present to his great countryman and contemporary, Machiaval; which, by the way, may serve to rectify a received error in chronology, that places one of these some years after the other. How or when it came into my hands, I shall desire to be excused, if I keep to myself; but so it is, that I have walked by it for the better part of a century to my safety at least, if not to my advantage; and have among my papers a register of all the changes that have happened in it from the middle of queen Elizabeth's reign. From my own Apartment, August 21. In every party there are two sorts of men, the In the time of that princess it stood long at setrigid and the supple. The rigid are an intractable tled fair. At the latter end of king James the First, race of mortals, who act upon principle, and will it fell to cloudy. It held several years after at not, forsooth, fall into any measures that are not stormy: insomuch, that at last, despairing of seeing consistent with their received notions of honour. any clear weather at home, I followed the royal These are persons of a stubborn unpliant morality; exile, and some time after, finding my glass rise, that sullenly adhere to their friends when they are returned to my native country, with the rest of the disgraced, and to their principles, though they are loyalists. I was then in hopes to pass the remainder exploded. I shall therefore give up this stiff-necked of my days in settled fair: but, alas! during the generation to their own obstinacy, and turn my greatest part of that reign, the English nation lay thoughts to the advantage of the supple, who pay in a dead calm, which, as it is usual, was followed their homage to places, and not persons; and, by high winds and tempests, until of late years; in without enslaving themselves to any particular which, with unspeakable joy and satisfaction, I. scheme of opinions, are as ready to change their have seen our political weather returned to settled, conduct in point of sentiment as of fashion. The fair. I must only observe, that for all this last well-disciplined part of a court are generally so per- summer my glass has pointed at changeable. Upon fect at their exercise, that you may see a whole as- the whole, I often apply to Fortune, Encas's speech sembly, from front to rear, face about at once to a to the Sibyl :-new man of power, though at the same time, they turn their backs upon him that brought them thither. The great hardship these complaisant members of society are under, seems to be the want of warning upon any approaching change or revolu. tion; so that they are obliged in a hurry to tack about with every wind, and stop short in the midst -Non ulla laborum O virgo, novo mi facies mopinave surgit: -No terror to my view, |