attacked me in modes and figures: but as I ftill held the negative, I fo often denied his terms, that at laft I put him quite out of his ftrings, before he could bring his arguments to a conclufion. In fhort, my last effort was to snap up a country parson, who was originally of the other University; but having a plurality of livings, and not being able to do his exercises there, he came to Cambridge to buy a master's degree. He lodg'd at our houfe; and feem'd fo greedily to devour the bait, that I had actually refolv'd to bid adieu to vanity, and to spend the reft of my life at his vicarage in making elder and birch wines, and in doing good offices to my poor neighbours. All the while he stay'd with us, we pamper'd him up with tid-bits: but the cur-mudgeon, as foon as his bufinefs was done, coolly took his leave of us, and flatly told me, he was a fool who married any woman out of an University; for they were faucy, proud, poor, and extravagant. My reign was now entirely at an end. Farewell, a long farewell to all my greatnefs! The gownsmen kept a respectful distance; and the tradefmen did not dare to approach me, as knowing my reputation for letters. 'Tis true, I was once pefter'd with the infolent pretenfions of a filly fhoe-maker, very wife in his own conceit,-one SOLOMON SALOP. His occupation leading him fometimes to converse with gentlemen, men of sense and learning, (whose indulgence he misconftrued into approbation) the ridiculous ape aukwardly affected their manners, and would decide, with all the pofitivenefs of ignorance, on matters of literature. Impudent incorrigible coxcomb !-But I foon filenc'd him (as I wish every one would, whenever he attempts even to speak) with the Latin adage, Ne futor ultra crepidam. And here, I think, I may properly introduce a very fingular gallant, a fort of mungrel between town and gown, being (as it were) of an amphibious nature, and partaking of both: I mean a bibliopola, or (as the vulgar have it) a bookfeller. The publication of a petit-piece in my younger days days first brought me to the acquaintance of Mr. BREVIER, who then practis'd the occupation of printer. He was an errant pedant in typical erudition: all his talk was of forms, neat impreffions, full and lean-fac'd capitals, points, Spaces, juftifications, and the like eloquent gibberish of his art. He would pride himself on his taste and judgment in manual compofition, and would often brag that no man was ever born with a greater artificial genius for fetting off a title-page. -Some time after, from being the mere mechanichal instrument, he became the packhorfe of literature; and from the inferior office of printing books, he advanc'd to the high employment of felling them. Then it was, that he prefum'd to aspire to my fmiles. As he knew my propensity to every kind of science, the way he took to ingratiate himself with me was to lend me (unask’d) all the new books of entertainment, as they came out: tho' he had afterwards the confcience to bring me in a long bill of so much per volume for reading them.-In this business he pick'd up a pretty penny, partly by felling old illegible MSS fermons to young clergymen, and partly by the craft he had once a year to get off the rubbish of his stock by way of auction, to the great emolument of poor fizers, ignorant freshmen, and foolish fellow-commoners. He us'd to judge of a man's learning by his library, and would say, fuch a one is a good scholar, he buys a great many books of me. Perhaps I might, in lieu of a better, have e'en taken up with this animal at last; but his conceit drove him to town, where he launch'd out into a very various and extenfive business. He began by enlisting scribblers into his fervice; and very lately honour'd me with the offer of a garret at the eafy rate of writing fixteen hours a day. Nay, he has turn'd author himself: he has written feveral pieces. which he got attributed to great men, and has been once damn'd at the theatre. He is a perfect adept in the mystery of his trade, and no man blows the bellows to his own forge more dextrously. But befides his knowledge as a bookfeller, Ff 2 bookfeller, he has a long time dealt in phyfic; but, I hear, he has lately commenc'd midwife, and is now dwindled into a mere old woman. I know not whether I ought to reckon among the number of my adorers, two perfons with whose acquaintance I am as yet honour'd. The firft is Mr. SAUNTER, our parish-paftor. My mother and my felf have equally known this civil gentleman for above twenty years; during which he has been conftantly us'd to our house. He feems to pay an equal court to us both; fays things to both equally complaifant; is equally fond of our company: fo that we are ftill in doubt which he is most enamour'd with, my mother or my self. The other is Mr. SULLEN. If I may judge of his behaviour, he has fome hankering towards me, as he is always dancing after me, and fits out my fire for months together. I have now been intimate with him for near fix years, but he has never once open'd his mouth about love, and feems frighted if he even touches me by accident. This Pythagorean lover may perhaps at the end of his seventh year break his filence; but till then I must be contented with dumb fhews, gefticulations, and diftant hieroglyphical declarations of his paffion. I now gladly take my leave of Academical Gallantry and its profeffors, defigning from henceforth to attend wholly to my newly imposed office of CAMBRIDGE, March 3, 1750. The FEMALE STUDENT. P. S. Our deputy at Oxford, has fent me a particular defcription of the prefent celebrated Oxford BEAUTIES, which fhall be in my next. A A PASTORAL A ELEGY. H, DAMON, dear fhepherd, adieu! Together in fondness we grew; What blifs can hereafter be mine? To his friendship I ne'er can incline, For fear I fhould mourn him like thee. Ah, DAMON, dear fhepherd, farewell! His afhes who lov'd me fo well, And murmur each eve o'er his stone, ON ON A GRAVE-STONE in a Country Church-Yard, TH By the fame. HE maid that owns this humble stone, Thou too, not unimprov'd depart; |