September, 1837.

THE DOUBLE BARREL.

BY FATHER PROUT.

Duo quisque Alpina coruscat Gæsa manu.—
—Æneid. lib. 8.

Παν πραγμα δυας έχει λαβας.-Εpictetus.

SEPTEMBER the first on the moorland hath burst,
And already with jocund carol

Each NIMROD of NOUSE hurries off to the grouse,
And has shouldered his DOUBLE BARREL;
For well doth he ken, as he hies through the glen,
That scanty will be his laurel

Who hath not

On the spot

(Should he miss a first shot)

Some resource in a DOUBLE BARREL.

'Twas the Goddess of Sport, in her sylvan court,
DIANA, first taught this moral,

Which the Goddess of Love soon adopted, and strove
To improve on the "double barrel."

Hence her CUPID, we know, put two strings to his bow;
And she laughs, when two lovers quarrel,

At the lot

Of the sot

Who, to soothe him, han't got

The resource of a DOUBLE BARREL.

Nay, the hint was too good to lie hid in the wood,

Ör to lurk in two lips of coral;

Hence the God of the Grape (who his betters would ape)
Knows the use of a DOUBLE BARREL.

His escutcheon he decks with a double XX,

And his blithe October carol

Follows up

With the sup

Of a flowing ale-cup
September's DOUble barrel.

Water-grass-hill, Kal. VIIbres

GENIUS; OR, THE DOG'S-MEAT DOG.

BEING A SECOND 66 TAILED SONNET," IN THE ITALIAN MANNER."

BY EGERTON WEBBE.

"Hal, thou hast the most unsavoury similes."-Falstaff.

SINCE Genius hath the immortal faculty
Of bringing grist to other people's mills,
While for itself no office it fulfils,

And cannot choose but starve amazingly,

* For the former specimen, as well as some critical account of the comic sonnets of the Italians, see the April number of Bentley's Miscellany.

VOL. II.

R

Methinks 'tis very like the dog's-meat dog,

That 'twixt Black Friars and White sometimes I've seen,Afflicted quadruped, jejune and lean,

Whom none do feed, but all do burn to flog.

For why? He draws the dog's-meat cart, you see,-
Himself a dog. All dogs his coming hail,

Long dogs and short, and dogs of various tail,
Yea truly, every sort of dogs that be.
Where'er he cometh him his cousins greet,
Yet not for love, but only for the meat,-
In Little Tower Street,

Or opposite the pump on Fish-street Hill,
Or where the Green Man is the Green Man still,
Or where you will:--

It is not he, but, ah! it is the cart

With which his cousins are so loth to part;
(That's nature, bless your heart!)
And you'll observe his neck is almost stiff
With turning round to try and get a sniff,
As now and then a whiff,

Charged from behind, a transient savour throws,
That curls with hope the corners of his nose,
Then all too quickly goes,

And leaves him buried in conjectures dark,
Developed in a sort of muffled bark.

For I need scarce remark

That that sagacious dog hath often guess'd
There's something going on of interest
Behind him, not confest;

And I have seen him whisk with sudden start
Entirely round, as he would face the cart,
Which could he by no art,

Because of cunning mechanism. Lord!
But how a proper notion to afford?
How possibly record,

With any sort of mental satisfaction,

The look of anguish-the immense distraction-
Pictured in face and action,

When, whisking round, he hath discovered there
Five dogs, all jolly dogs-besides a pair
Of cats, most debonair,

In high assembly met, sublimely lunching,
Best horse's flesh in breathless silence munching,
While he, poor beast! is crunching
His unavailing teeth ?—You must be sensible
aggravating-cruel-indefensible-
Incomprehensible.

'Tis

And to his grave I do believe he'll go,
Sad dog's-meat dog, nor ever know

Whence all those riches flow

Which seem to spring about him where he is,
Finding their way to every mouth but his.-

I know such similes

COMPRISING FURTHER PARTICULARS OF OLIVER'S STAY AT MR. BROWNLOW'S, WITH THE REMARKABLE PREDICTION WHICH ONE MR. GRIMWIG UTTERED CONCERNING HIM, WHEN HE WENT OUT ON AN ERRAND.

OLIVER SOON recovered from the fainting-fit into which Mr. Brownlow's abrupt exclamation had thrown him; and the subject of the picture was carefully avoided, both by the old gentleman and Mrs. Bedwin, in the conversation that ensued, which indeed bore no reference to Oliver's history or prospects, but was confined to such topics as might amuse without exciting him. He was still too weak to get up to breakfast; but, when he came down into the housekeeper's room next day, his first act was to cast an eager glance at the wall, in the hope of again looking on the face of the beautiful lady. His expectations were disappointed, however, for the picture had been removed. "Ah!" said the housekeeper, watching the direction of Oliver's eyes. "It is gone, you see."

"I see it is, ma'am," replied Oliver, with a sigh. "Why have they taken it away ?"

"It has been taken down, child, because Mr. Brownlow said, that, as it seemed to worry you, perhaps it might prevent your getting well, you know," rejoined the old lady.

"Oh, no, indeed it didn't worry me, ma'am," said Oliver. "I liked to see it; I quite loved it."

"Well, well!" said the old lady, good-humouredly; "you get well as fast as ever you can, dear, and it shall be hung up again. There, I promise you that; now let us talk about some thing else."

This was all the information Oliver could obtain about the picture at that time, and as the old lady had been so kind to him in his illness, he endeavoured to think no more of the subject just then; so listened attentively to a great many stories she told him about an amiable and handsome daughter of hers, who was married to an amiable and handsome man, and lived in the country; and a son, who was clerk to a merchant in the West Indies, and who was also such a good young man, and wrote such dutiful letters home four times a year, that it brought the tears into her eyes to talk about them. When the old lady had expatiated a long time on the excellences of her children, and the merits of her kind good husband besides, who had been dead and gone, poor dear soul! just six-and-twenty years, it was time to have tea; and after tea she began to teach Oliver cribbage, which he learnt as quickly as she could teach, and at which game they played, with great interest and gravity, until it was