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munity at large. has not their

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Nothing shall come into vogue, which imprimatur' stamped upon it: nothing shall be bad, which they choose to recommend.

"This system exists notoriously and widely in every department of the fine arts. I have heard various complaints of certain evil practices, as not unknown or unemployed even in the Royal Academy. But I shall produce no specific charge at the present moment, as I may not altogether be prepared to substantiate it. Why, however, will not people take a friendly admonition; when they know that it must be followed, if it is neglected, by some decisive accusation, which cannot be brought against them, without giving them pain, nor proved against them, without covering them with disgrace?

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"I would pounce at present upon ignobler game. I would wish to draw attention to the presuming coxcombs, whose business is to teach accomplishments to young gentlemen, and young ladies. Now, the puffing and humbug, of which these gentlemen are most scientific professors, are always connected and accompanied with imposition and extortion, injustice and oppression. My meaning will be made more evident by an illustration. Let us take a music-master, for instance; among his many privileges, he has usually the opportunity of recommending a harp, or a piano-forte, or whatever the instrument may be, to the pretty scholar who distrusts her own judgment, or her mamma's. What is the regular proceeding of our musicmaster on such an occasion. Why, to praise the instruments of Mr. Broadwood, or Mr. Stodart, or Mr. Clementi, or Mr. Mott, exactly as he is most lavishly rewarded for his puff. Madam,' says he, with his best smile, there is really only one man in town who can make instruments fit for your daughter to play upon; her divine touch would be spoiled by the clumsy and inharmonious machines, which are fabricated by any other person. Those of Mr.-,' he continues, naming his man, are not only more beautiful in tone, but they are, in the bargain, by far the most elegant pieces of furniture to stand in a drawing-room.' Order me one from Mr.

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immediately, 'says the lady. The instrument is

ordered accordingly; and for every harp or piano-forte, which he thus manages to puff off, the music-master receives his ten, twenty, or thirty, guineas from the maker. Who do we suppose is the loser in this case? The maker of the instrument? Not he, forsooth. The tax is paid not by the producer but the consumer; the additional charge is defrayed not by the person who makes the instrument, but by the person, who buys it. The manufacturer will have his clear profit, or he will throw his business to the dogs. In a word, musical instruments will become dearer in general to the purchasers by exactly the sum which is allowed to the music-master for his humbug and his imposition.

"But the iniquity of the thing goes farther. We will suppose that a lady, or a gentleman, has heard from some of their friends, that such or such a man makes excellent instruments upon a new and peculiar principle; we will suppose, moreover, that she, or he, hears, approves, and purchases one of these instruments, without asking, as it happens, the advice and opinion of the music-master, Well; although his advice or opinion has not been asked, although he cannot claim even the merit of ingenious puffing, he nevertheless absolutely hurries off to the maker, and demands ten, twenty, thirty, or fifty guineas-(hear you this Mr.?) as his perquisite. The inventor of the instrument has no wish, perhaps, to keep this worthy in his pay; he resists the extortion; and refuses to present him with the number of guineas, which he so modestly requests, merely because fate has made him a musicmaster. What is the sequel? The music-master returnspronounces the instrument to be vile-to be execrable-to be absolute torture to his ear; produces a multitude of hard words in support of his opinion; declares the man who dared to sell it, to be a quack, a scoundrel, an impostor;-and by the next morning the instrument is returned. Hear you this again Mr. ? (N. B. The speaker mentioned the names: but we have rather chosen to leave blanks. Conscience can fill them up.)

"This is only a single ramification of the system. It prevails equally among dancing-masters, drawing-masters-."

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The orator was now warm with his subject, and appeared only to have reached the middle of his harangue: but at this moment the writer of the present article was summoned to attend a meeting of the Council of Ten. After some other business, he introduced the subject, which he had lately heard under discussion. "You have done well;" said the President," our Council is the proper tribunal before which such matters should be brought. Such abuses well deserve detection and reprehension; and it shall be our care, that they meet with their deserts." "To be sure," said the Projector, "you have produced a tolerable catalogue; but innumerable kinds of cant and quackery still remain unnoticed. There is the puff theatrical, the humbug of the public spectacles, which requires especial mention. For my own part, I have it in contemplation to compose an elaborate treatise upon this subject; and humbly dedicate it to the Booksellers, Authors, Reviewers, Stage-managers, and public in general, of the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Ireland. I have not yet quite fixed upon the name; but it may be called either "The System of Humbug displayed," or "Puffing made Easy," Every man his own Puffer." My intention is to reduce humbug to a science; to explain both the theory and the practice; and to afford plain and concise rules applicable to all cases, enriched with copious illustrations and examples. It will be a work, I am aware, rather of research and compilation, than of imagination, and original wit.”

or

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"Really," said the President, "I can see no necessity for any production of the kind. The system is sufficiently understood, Mr. Projector, without your assistance. I hate the words; but if I must repeat them, I can only affirm, that men already find it quite easy enough to puff themselves, and make fools of others. If our undertaking has procured no other advantage for us, it has at least given us an insight into the mystery of things, and the humbug of human life. Already there have been persons applying to us for permission to bepraise themselves and their friends through the medium of our publicationas if we were Reviewers. But you are most in the secret, Projector; you can explain the matter more satisfactorily to the Council."

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"You know," said the Projector, "when the first number of our publication appeared, it was my business to have it brought, if possible, fairly and fully before the public. I proceeded to a literary friend of long experience. Well, said I, what is to be done first? Done first! why, you must get into favour with the trade: you must make allies of the booksellers. Unless they give you a helping hand, and puff the thing, you are ruined.' I went to a bookseller. What is to be done, said I. Done! why you must get puffed in the Magazines.'-For I will do these gentlemen the justice to say, that they never mince matters; but call things by their right names at once without shame and without scruple: 'Oh! but we are no friends to Magazines, or Reviews, or the phalanx of criticism in general.' It is a phalanx, young gentlemen, which you will find it very difficult to break through.' Well, but,' said I, if we ask them to puff us first, with what grace shall we afterwards be able to abuse them ?' That is your own affair, not mine,' quoth the bookseller. 'No,' I replied; we cannot have recourse to this method: what is the next best step which you would recommend with regard to the publication ?'You must paragraph it.'— Paragraph it!' I exclaimed; 'what in the devil's name is paragraphing it? Why, you must send some such notice as the following; and give a guinea for having it inserted in the papers; not as an advertisement, but as a paragraph written by the Editors themselves: We hear that a new periodical work, called the Council of Ten, is turning the heads of all the fashionables in London. It is replete, we can assure our readers, with wit, spirit, eloquence, and knowledge; and we are credibly informed, that five thousand copies have been sold within a week.'- Impossible, Sir, impossible! What! would you put literary men and their productions upon the same-nay, upon a lower footing than Mr. Carroll and his lottery-puffs, or Messrs. Day and Martin and their blacking; or Mr. Atkinson and his vegetable fluid; or Dr. Solomon and his abominable quackeries?'' Good God, Sir,' replied the bookseller in a passion, if you will not do what your betters have done before you, I wash my hands of you, and wish you a very good morning.' "Pray, Projector," asked the Major, "did this conver

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sation with the bookseller take place before, or after, your dispute with the stranger in the coffee-room?"-" Spare me," said the Projector; " not a word upon that subject. I was merely making an experiment in the puffing system; I was just trying it on a little,' as they say. For aught I know, there may be a little humbug, even among the Ten: but at all events we have less of it than any of our contemporaries."

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MEETING OF THE COUNCIL.

NOTICE TO CORRESPONDENTS.

The meetings of our council have been very frequent during the last month; but its transactions have not been such as can be immediately submitted to public notice. The Secret Committee has been also very active in its inquiries into various matters of importance. We believe, that its report, when it is ready, will be found to contain much that will interest, and something that will surprise.

With regard to our correspondents, we have generally to return our thanks for the kind wishes, which they express for our success; the generous concern, which they take in the arduousness of our undertaking; and, moreover, for the very valuable hints, which many of them have suggested to us.

We shall be glad of a personal interview with "Detector."

We have sent an answer to " F. R. W." through our publisher; and also to R. Q., as he desired.

We confess, that the extraordinary practice, mentioned by A Friend," is altogether new to us. If his statement be correct, it must, and shall be, exposed. But every proposition, which he advances, must be fully authenticated and verified, before we stir a single step in the business. He must remember, that, although we may be willing to risk our ease and comfort for the promotion of the public good; personal quarrels and legal prosecutions are not things to be desired for their own sake.

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