trouble to examine into the accounts of a Mess, for a period which ought to harmonize with our own; but, to my sorrow, that examination proves the ruinous, extravagant, ill-managed system now pursued so clearly, that I will read the brief extracts which I have made : The accounts for the same month in the year 1793 (loud and continued laughter) show the sum total expended to be 127. 14s. 6d. and now to my utter dismay, I observe our expenditure to be the enormous sum of 161. 2s. 34d. which makes a surplus deficit (laughter and cheers) I would say a wasteful surplus unnecessary expenditure of 31. 7s. 8d. "Our mouths are pretty near the same size as in the year 1793. (Bravo!) Our bodies have the same work to perform; butter, salt fish, and pickled tripe, Harvey's sauce, Durham mustard, and red cabbage, have the same effects, and are nearly the same price; coffee is as good as Boco can vouch; Potatoes are not less nutritive or prolific, for which I appeal to Paddy, and the monopoly on souchong being likely to expire, we shall have it better and cheaper. Why then, I would ask, ought our expenditure to be greater than in the year 1793? (Hear, hear! and a laugh.) I for one, will not consent to continue Peter in his office until he shall have shown us clearly, why such additional expenditure has taken place, (Hear, hear!) and until I perceive a disposition for economical reform. As we had no dinners to day, we may have still less to morrow. (Cheers!) Goths, what do you laugh at ? did you never hear of Sir Isaac Newton's numbers less than nothing? (Cheers) If we go on increasing our expenditure when we have nothing to expend, (loud cheers!) we shall be obliged to draw on the empty substantiality of Peter's purse. (Hear, hear!) to avoid which dreadful alternative, I give my firm support to Muzzy's proposition.' Gruff begged to observe, that gentlemen on both sides seemed to indulge in their own peculiar music, which to him was entirely out of time and tune, as they had not said one word about roast beef and plum puddings-things essential to their very existence-things to which he had long been accustomed, and would continue to have in despite of all newfangled notions, and as there had been no such good stuff to day, he would support Muzzy's motion. Boco rose, hem'd, haw'd, but brought forth nothing. Several other abortive members were coughed down to rise no more, and then Fire Eater, who had eaten nothing since breakfast, struck his fist upon the table for attention. "By the reckonings, guessings, and calculations which have been entered into by the different speakers, we might suppose ourselves on the other side of the Atlantic but here (Dieu Merci!) we wish for no discrepant reckoners, no vituperant guessers, no tergiversating calculators. "I would as soon trust a Panangt as a Philadelphia lawyer; the latter confounds the head, and the former breaks it at once, and there's an end on't. Let Peter stand forth and answer, why there is no dinner to day?" Here the reluctant Peter said, to day's allowance was drawn yesterday, and no advance would be made, although he had used his best entreaties with the person at the head of the victualling depart ment. 66 "If the fellow," continued Fire Eater, can give no reasonable answer, let him not only be brought to book but to the stake. Strip him, I say, of the emblems of his office; which, if we trust to Mr. Smudge's reasoning, may still jingle in his empty pocket. (Cheers?) 1 repeat, if Peter be found deficient, seize him, depose him, punish him. Here Peter made his escape, and the laws, which were suspended over his chair, were torn down and burnt in the snuffer-stand, amidst the triumphant shouts of the revolutionists, and a wellregulated mess became a scene of confusion. The following day six members were chosen to conduct the affairs, in which republican state, we are sorry to say, it still remains. HOME NEWS. Atrocious Outrage. It is with the deepest feelings of sympathy, that we communicate the particulars of the atrocious outrage committed on the person and property of Patrick Donnavan, Esq. of the Marines, at the dead hour of midnight, on Monday last. Patrick on this direful night, had retired to bed, and lay, as he was wont to do, like a good harmless dormant lump of clay fast locked in the arms of Morpheus. His cot was under the shade of the sentinel's lamp: but the hardened villains cozened the soldier from his post, and perpetrated the blackest deed that ever soiled our pages. A large bucketful of black varnish and tar was poured in upon the inoffensive + A bamboo cane is jocularly called a Panang lawyer. carcase of the unhappy man, but we shall conclude the horrid description in his own words, uttered this morning before the chief-magistrate. "I was asleep, fast asleep, in bed in my cabin, when all on a sudden I felt, I don't know how, half choked, half-suffocated, and deprived of all my senses but smelling, and that source of sensibility seemed only stuffed with poison. I tried to move, and when I succeeded, I found my pillow glued, as it were to the back of my head. I stretched out my hands to clear my mouth, eyes, nose, and ears, when I heard a kind of rustling, like elephants among the reeds of a jungle, succeeded by smothered bursts of fiendlike laughter, and a hissing voice then said, "Oh the Galoot! now's the time, his eyes are full, finish the work!" at which there was a general splash that converged about my head, and I was actually afloat. Was this a deadly dream, or real death? -The voice, the rustling, the fall, and the inauspicious vessel that was left in my bed, proclaimed the rest, and Sir, as this is a most unheard of outrage to be committed on one holding a commission, I hope that endeavours will be used to discover and punish the perpetrators." This is the hour when memory wakes, Sweet dreams that could not last; She brings before the pensive mind, The few we liked, the one we .oved, We are sorry to add, that no clue was left by which to trace the ruffians, and we have little hopes of any of them turning And many a form far hence removed, king's evidence. All that could be discovered were foot-marks on the cockpitladder outlined by tar and varnish. No property was stolen, nor can we assign any reason for the act: it has however been suggested to us, by a correspondent, that Patrick had retired to bed unshaven, and that Neptune's officer deputy may be fairly suspected.-Night Watch. And many a pleasure gone. Friendship's that now in death are hushed, Affection's broken chain' And hopes, that fate too quickly crushed, I watch the fading gleams of day, I muse on bright science flown; G. B. C. MAY DAY VOTARIES AND CHIMNEY SWEEPERS' SPORTS, "Poor fellows! this is their great festival." If the creative fecundity of earth, air, and sky, animates the philosopher, the poet, the peasant, and tourist,-if the concentrated body of dissenters are drawn into their pleasures in the metropolis,—if the moralist, differing with the relaxed opinions of his anti-associates, becomes more rigid the more powerfully the spring develops the passions of general natures, -a liberal spirit dictates to each and all, simply and collectively, to fill the chalice of opportunity with joy. The papist might be abstemious, and fast; the Israelite might clothe himself in "sackcloth and ashes ;"-the lover of external nature might encourage sceneries, visions, and rhapsodies. The citizen might rusticate out of the smoke-dried houses in narrow lanes and pent-up alleys, and take his collations in snug security: the sea-voyager might trip to Land's End by steam;-the traveller might trust his views to the outside conveyance of a patent coach; the tippler might moralize with his breathing pipe, so that he does not drown the moral in his cup ;-the family-man might fill the chaise with children, victuals, and riding comforts: the good and trusty housewife might, like a hen, cluck with her chickens round her, and venture into the fields;-boys might advance their kites and balls in the air ;athletic artizans might fling the coit, strike the trap, lift the bell, throw the javelin, hit the target, and guard the wicket;-the aeronaut might sail in floods of wind, and disappear in seas of æther. If such, then, be the occupations, such the tendencies of society in England, the first of Maythe ever memorable and hilarious Mayday, is redolent with a thousand springs of active benevolence and sport, working in the breasts, and shining in the eyes, of sooty chimney sweepers. Hither, come hither, all ye young feet, light hearts, and flexible faces. Hear ye not the rumbling sound of the drum, and clatter of the shovel and brush? See ye not the bustle of people as the procession comes nearer and nearer, and is angling the corners of the square? The chimney sweepers are here. Think ye not of the Montagues? Make way! "I have a kindly yearning toward these dim specks, poor blots, innocent blacknesses, these almost clergy imps, who sport their cloth without assumption." Jack-in-the-Green is dancing to the chimney music, as he carries and trundles the leafy house about his ears, in a circle of brazen frontispieces. The lass chosen for the revelry, is of the fairest boys in the train, with a bold face smart leg, and winsome: she makes jokes at the kind-hearted gentlemen and scruples not to crack a sauce-box with the shining brass ladle. Her personification of the hoyden is perfect. She exchanges the prevailing stay fashion of fifty years since for a bustle. Her dance savours of the morris. Her romping curtsey in the finale is a grimace in the motion of elegance. The toss of her head, like that of a halfpenny, to which she is accustomed, is lofty, either Head or Woman! She tips the wink with her eye, as easily as with a glass. Her stare at the caps and curls hung out of the upper rooms, for a remembrance of the " """ is fepoor sweeps!" licitous and true to nature. To those who retire, or walk on, after seeing the anni versary, without alms-giving, her epithets are, like Juvenal's, caustic. Then the jerk of her partner's feet, the quirk of his elbow and face, meantime, beating right and left with weapons which are brickscrapers and hallooers in chimney-pots, and performing duties with a brush by ascension. These are followed by the little gingerbread, sore-eyed, and blain-heeled boys, with pipe-tones and half-mourning limbs, like joy and grief blended. However refreshing the virgin showers of a May noon rainbow, and however beautifully the flowers open in the haunts of the cuckoo and blossom-hid blackbird, down whose glossy plumage dew-drops run like quicksilver; yet, the hope-gathering chimney sweepers, who are not used to the washing sweetness of may-liquid, nor appreciate the sensation of drops moistening dry ground, like draughts to feverish throats, are pitiable objects besmeared in garlands, as amateurs in corn fields exhibit the misfortunes attendant on merry efforts. It is asserted, whether truly or not, masters and mistresses are the getters-up of this commemoration; that the poor creatures who try their histrionic talent on the stage of May day, and the two succeeding days, to a street audience, like the Athenians of old, and disastrous players in provincial towns, labour "worthy of their hire," but do not participate in proportionate benefit. 66 The miseries of climbing boys are many: their mercies ought to be so. Mercy was never so wounded before," the art of chimney tracing by boys, when it is known they are society only with those whom they carry on the sooty trade, it should be understood these orphans, blackened into growth as they are, ought to climb into colliquative feelings with as much affection as their more fastidious brotherhood in callings of fairer proportion.* To say they are painted and bedecked as they dance, 'Hey trim, hey, go trix,' would not libel higher classes, but moralise Hamlet's sentiment of Yorick's skull. Whether pride is vulgar or refined, human frailty will appear 66 in the wind and the rain." Where a lamp-post stands, (these tyburnChimney sweepers are born for sights. * Dr. Birkbeck has proposed in one of his lectures at the Mechanics' Institute, the construction of chimneys so as to supersede the necessity of climbing boys. And a Mr. Hiort has obtained letters patent for an improved construction of chimney, which is calculated to do away with the employing of Climbing Boys. tree lamp posts are going out to make way for the stately gas-iron lamps) or a wall is left, they are sure to scale it and take a first place, and over-top the power-getting advantages of the wealthy; here, too, they sit in security, as their clamours, like rooks in elm trees, declare. At the theatre, when a new pantomime is in vogue, they keep the front seats: their vantage ground is visible by their holding it con amore in Olympic authority. Like cuirassiers, their dress secures them. At the river they fish in "untroubled waters, ," cleaner boys being "out of their line," stand from them at respectful distance. They are not afraid of the mud bath, but glory in wading propensities. Find me an erudite reflector, who can select so cheap a luxury as this, of managing the tribes of the pond with a stick, crooked pin, thread, broken pitcher, and blood-worms. It is the sweep at one end and a prickleback at the other. Ask the gaunt charity-boy, whose clothes creep up his arms and legs, and whose head grows too large for his cap, if any sport (excepting frog-catching) surpasseth the rural occupation of the modern Walton's? Ask the truant who steals time out of school books, and like a member of parliament, vacates his seat for the Chiltern hundreds, if aught is so exquisite, as a stroll in gear, though alone, (an angler is never alone, because patience attends him as a shadowed virtue) to brook margins, canals, aud ditches. To notice the anxieties of hustlecap, chouse, and hop-scotch; to delineate the sausageeating feats at Bartlemy, and enter fully into the habits of chimney sweepers during their course of education, is beyond these limits prescribed. Let, then, the ascetic, the usurer, the stone-hearted misanthropist, live in concealed vanity, abhorrent to the better portion of mankind; but, so long as chimneys require sweeping, and sweepers require recreation, may the honours of May-day be celebrated in the anticipated exertions of their prologue, and the great drama of society be more humanely represented each returning year, to their edification and well being, since "Golden lads and lasses must, My country, when I think of all I've lost, And birthright of thy sons, by patriots gained, Forget the higher aims for which I've strained; ORIGINAL LETTER OF AMY ROB- THE following letter cannot fail of being read with unusual interest, since it is, we believe, the only memorial of the kind which is extant of the well known AMYE ROBSERT, the unfortunate wife of Robert Dudley, earl of Leicester. The date of the year is not mentioned; the contents of the letter describe the sorrow of the fair writer for the departure of her lord, and exhibit both of them in an amiable light; he, as being extremely solicitous that some poor men should be paid that which was due to them; and she, as willing to make a pecuniary sacrifice, in order that his wishes might be immediately fulfilled. It is not a little singular, that it was necessary to sell some wool for the purpose of raising the money required, and which tends to fix the time in which the letter was written to an early period of Dudleys fortune. This letter is preceded in the M. S. where it is preserved by one signed "R. Duddeley," dated "from Hays, this Friday morning, Sent Magdylin's daye," and directed to his "vearrie speed," thanking him for the trouble he frinde John Flowerdew, esquier, wt. had taken in his affairs respecting Flicham and Sydisterne. As in the 6th of Elizabeth, 1563, Dudley was created Baron Denbigh and Earl' of Leicester, his letter must have been written before that year; and it is most probable that Lady Dudley's was written about that time. A remarkable letter, relative to the suspicious manner in which she died, will be found in Hayne's Burghley Papers. Mr. Flowerdew, to whom both the letters in question are addressed, was of Hethersett, in Norfolk; by Katherine, daughter of William Sheres, of Ashwelthorpe, in that county, he had issue seven sons, of whom Edward, the fourth son, was made a serjeant-at-law, in September, 1580, and appointed a Baron of the Exchequer, 23rd October, 1584. "TO MY VARY FRYND, MR. FLOWER- Frome Mr. "Your assured duryng lyffe, VIRTUE. A Lady's dress and reputation are equally sacred; the person who meddles with either, may tremble for the vengeance of the offended fair. CONSCIENCE Will make us betray and fight against ourselves, and for want of other witnesses, give evidence against its owner. COUNSEL. Some men would be wise, if they did not think themselves so: for such a fond opinion of one's self hinders us from taking counsel of such as are qualified to give it. CRUELTY Is the extreme of all vices, an offence to God, and an abhorrence to nature, the grief of good men, and a pleasure only to devils and monsters divested of humanity. FOLLY. To see some persons set up for wits, is enough to move a wise man's compassion; because they take pains to make themselves ridiculous, and lay out their sense, to appear a master-piece in buffoonery. BOCCACIO'S TOMB. The reproach cast by Lord Byron, in the fourth canto of " Childe Harold," of the people of Certaldo, the native place on Boccacio, that the author's tomb had been 66 uptorn" by bigots, was refuted by the Canon Cateni, who asserted that Boccacio's cenotaph had remained uninjured in the Church of Certaldo. In a late publication by the Abbé Poveda, we have a full examination of this contested point. It appears that there were two monuments, one consisting of a marble slab on the pavement over Boccacio's grave, and another more sumptuous, raised against the latent wall of the church, by the Podesta of Certaldo, 128 years after the author's death. By a false interpretation of a law of Leopold in the last century, which prohibited having sepulchres in the churches, the first was removed, together with the remains of Boccacio, consisting of the skull and hones, and a leaden tube, containing parchments, which last remained in the rector's possession. The slab having broke in the removal, was thrown down in the adjoining cloisters. Lately, a lady of the name of Lenzoni, has collected these memo |